The Greatest Blog Ever Written...

Curtain Call

2006-12-01T20:52:00.000-05:00

Let's face it......this blog has lost some of it's lustre of late.

I was going to refurbish this blog when I switched it over to Blogger Beta. Unfortunately, when I went to make the switch a couple of days ago, it wouldn't let me.

Alas, I started a Blogger Beta account anyway.....and a new blog was born.

I'll keep The Greatest Blog Ever Written (now switched over to Beta) open for the old posts. But my new home is......

....wait for it....

......HERE.

The Dangers of Underage Drinking

2006-11-19T09:22:00.000-05:00

I was out on my daily stroll with Rudy at about 8pm last night. While making our way down a desolate and poorly lit stretch of sidewalk along the main roadway, I stumbled upon a 3/4 full mickey of Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum laying on the sidewalk. Given that it was Saturday night, I assume that some local youth dropped it out of his pocket/backpack/pantleg while on his/her way to wherever they had intended to imbibe the contraband. It seems to be the most logical explanation. So I picked it up and dumped it out at the roadside, lest some minor come upon it.

Yet another fine example while those underage aren't responsible enough to drink. They aren't able to hold their liqour.

Emasculation 101

2006-11-19T09:10:00.000-05:00

Have you ever had one of those moments where you are doing something without thinking, then suddenly realize what you are doing and say to yourself, "What the hell?"

For example, if you're out grocery shopping and you discover yourself singing along to the music being piped through the store speaker system, which happens to be Hold On by Wilson Philips. And you're singing out loud. And you're a guy.

What the hell?

Synergy

2006-11-18T11:35:00.000-05:00

Has anyone else noticed the (not-so) subtle marketing being employed by Sony?

If anyone has been to the movies lately you may have seen the Playstation 3 ad preceding the trailers in which a boy walks up to the roof of his apartment building (in New York presumably) and everyone is looking up in the sky as a '3' casts a shadow over the city. When I first saw it, I though it was a preview for Spider-man 3.

Slick.

Passing A Stone

2006-11-16T19:57:00.000-05:00

Most days, sometime shortly after dinner, I put on my shoes, throw on my jacket, grab the leash and take my dog out for a walk. It has become a time of day where I am alone with my thoughts and allow my mind to wander. Quite often, my wanderings lead me towards blogging. This may be blogs I have read and perhaps want to comment on, or topics I want to write about. The ideas come easily, and in my mind I compose entries that are things of beauty. I think to myself, "Self....this is a great idea. In the immortal words of Van Wilder.....write that down."

Once home, I sit down at my computer, log onto Blogger, crack my knuckles and.....

......nothing.

Words fail, desire fades, time dissipates. Nothing is written. The entire process causes me no end of aggravation, and no doubt is dissappointing to those who still bother to check in here. I suppose the addition of Alexandra to our family and the demands that she places on myself and Tam has played a significant role. On days that I work, I'm away from home for 12 hours at minimum, so that doesn't leave a lot of time for other pursuits. I've also found that contrary to my theory that putting the computer in the same room as the t.v. would increase my productivity (the two-birds-with-one-stone principle), the exact opposite is true. My attention is pulled between the computer and the idiot box resulting in my not really enjoying either. My blogging delinquency is not to be attributed to lack of ideas, though. Here is but a sampling of topics bouncing around my head:

An Interview With Myself
Religion...Hooah: What is it good for?
Recipe for a Great Commute
Why Galactica Would Completely Frak Up The Enterprise
Random Christmas Gift Ideas for my Family (vol. 1 - x)
Review: Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
A Letter To My Favourite Teacher
Alexandra: Crying, Eating, Pooping, Sleeping
Things I've Learned From Watching The Ultimate Fighting Championship
The Story of Herschel Wilson
Identity Crisis: Blueteeth, Tattoos and Baggy Jeans
Television Sucks (But I Watch It Anyway)
It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time

My memory presents those for your consumption, but rest assured there have been many, many more. If you have a burning desire to see any of those come to fruition, please let me know. Alternatively, if you have an idea for a post, it may just motivate me to write, so fire away.

Something else which has been hampering my ability to write lately is the fact that this is post 100.

Whoop-dee-doo!

I've done the math, and I average out at about 9 spectacular posts a month, or 1 ever 3 1/2 days. And some are cop-outs like this.

Anyway....there you have it. Number one hundred. Hope you enjoyed it.

P.S. I wasn't invited to TomKat's wedding. I'm sooooo not sending them anything.

Remembrance Day

2006-11-11T12:00:00.000-05:00

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

-John McCrae-

Eviction Notice

2006-11-06T19:51:00.000-05:00

Remember this?

Well friends....there's been a new development. As it turns out, the poor buggers living in the fence in my backyard who faced the business end of a can of wasp killer may have been innocent. (Did you see that? Did you see what I did there? Buggers? I slay me.) While I was outside this afternoon doing some yardwork, I made a startling discovery.....

...a big honkin' wasp nest located in a cedar in the front yard right where I suffered my tragic injury. I present this startling photographic evidence as proof.

A little hedge trimming leads to a shocking revelation.

Peek-a-boo.

Presenting the evidence.

Luckily (for them), the previous tenants had vacated. Nevertheless, I made the eviction official, lest they come back and set up shop next season.

I am wise to your tactics, wasps. When next we meet on the field of battle, I shall not be duped so easily.

So Sue Me

2006-10-31T13:17:00.000-05:00

I'm back. Just not very motivated.

Parenthood, Paintball and Peter's Query

2006-10-22T22:38:00.000-04:00

I'm tired and I desperately need to get some sleep, but I feel obligated to write something since it will be the better part of a week before I get another chance.

Life at the homestead has been exciting but tiring as the wife and I explore parenthood. Luckily we've had live-in help for the better part of the month (thanks moms) which has made the transition a little easier. It's amazing how fast the day goes by when you have a little person to take care of.

That being said, I did manage to weasel out of my fatherly responsibilties yesterday morning to go spend a few hours playing paintball with a couple of the old high school chums. That makes one outing this year and once last year. I definitely need to increase the frequency, because it was a great time (as usual).

So high school chum Peter says to me, "Hey Dave...nice blog. What's the deal with the chick you're promoting?" The question sounded a bit familiar. I believe that he is talking about Jessica Stover. I gave him the two second response before we were interrupted by someone or something (probably Darren barking orders about filling loaders or something). In any event, Jessica recently did and interview with Eventful that explains a lot about her project. There is also an interesting thread being discussed on her site about the new television show Heroes and movies and other such business. Check it out. Perhaps when I get back I'll write something more about why I support Jess' projects and how I got involved.

In the meantime, enjoy a picture of Alexandra (with a few more added to Flickr).

Later, skaters. (no funny business while I'm away)

Fatherhood: Week 1

2006-10-14T14:53:00.000-04:00

It's little wonder that my readership is so small, given my frequency of blog entries.

I suppose I have a bit of an excuse of late (who would have thought having a child was so time consuming?). Regardless, perhaps it's time for an update.

As per my previous post, Alex was born at 2:49 a.m. on October 5th. We actually went in to the hospital at 7:30 a.m. on October 4th for our induction, but it turned out to be a long process. Gels were applied at around 8:45 a.m. and again around 1:00 p.m., but it wasn't until about 6:00 pm. that Tam's water broke (a messy affair in the birthing unit hallway as we were out for a stroll). Then the labour began. She was in a lot of pain. I did what I could to comfort, but there wasn't a lot of fun to be had. Around 9:00 p.m. they decided to give her an epidural. This lessened the pain significantly (or so I'm told). Things didn't progress quite as well as hoped, and the doctor decided in the early morning hours of the 5th that it would probably be best to proceed by way of a Caesarian section. I called home as they got her ready to be wheeled into the O.R.

Once they were prepped and had started the surgery, I was allowed into the operating room. Tam was shaking uncontrollably from the epidural, which is apparently a normal side effect. I kept her company as the docs did their work. Around 2:49 a.m., I heard a cry, and we were soon treated to a view of our daughter before they whisked her away to clean her up and so forth. Shortly thereafter, I was given our bundle of joy to hold as they needed to stitch up the wife and monitor vitals for a while. We proceeded to the special care nursery where they did a "heel prick" to test the blood. Alex's blood sugar was low, so they supplemented her with some formula and would have to monitor her overnight until they had 3 tests over the acceptable blood sugar levels. She had a quick visit with the grandmothers and her great-uncle Bebe who had come to the hospital to say hello. Mom didn't get to hold her daughter until a couple hours later until she was back in her room and the effects of the epidural had started to wear off a bit.

Due to the C-section we had to stay in the hospital until Sunday afternoon. Alex spent a while on the "tanning bed" as she was showing some signs of jaundice. We had a number of visitors from both sides attend the hospital to meet the newest addition to the family. As we had a private room, someone was able to stay overnight with mom and daughter. I did so on Thursday and Saturday night, with the mother-in-law assuming the duty on Friday night.

Things have gone relatively well since being home. The pets, while perhaps a bit jealous, haven't tried to attack the little one, and mostly ignore her. Alex sleeps a lot, and through just about any noise. However, she seems to get extremely aggravated around 11:00 p.m. (gas?) and persists in her cranky state until usually at least 3:00 a.m. Thankfully, after that she seems to sleep fairly well.

She's absolutely adorable, and I'm in love. Taking care of her takes so much time, but it seems well worth it. Overnight, it's as if priorities have shifted. It is incredible how one little person can have such a profound effect on your life. I'm sure there will be many more stories to tell in the days, weeks, and years to come.

Keep checking My Flickr page as I will update new photos there with some regularity.

Daughter

2006-10-05T13:41:00.000-04:00

It's official. My life has been forever altered.

At 02:49 a.m. on October 5th, 2006, my wife and I welcomed into the world our daughter, Alexandra Emery Ruth Grant. Delivered by Caesarian Section at 37 weeks, she weighed in at 7 lbs. and 14.9 ounces and measured 21.5 inches long. Both mom and daughter are doing well. If all goes well, both will be home by Sunday. Here's a picture of our little "Alex". More to be posted (check Flickr) as time permits.

So Scary It's Funny

2006-09-30T13:03:00.000-04:00

7 Days

2006-09-27T20:20:00.000-04:00

It was recently brought to my attention that I had not posted anything for a while. Taking the matter under advisement, I decided to investigate. It appears that they were correct. It has been a while. The root cause for this delinquency is that I have been extremely busy both at work and at home as I get ready for the birth of my daughter in seven days.

I'm going to let that sink in for just a moment.

Seven days? Seven freakin' days!?

Where exactly did the last 9 months go? I'm sure my wife would be able to provide a detailed accounting, but for me, the time has gone quickly.....maybe above the speed limit. It seems like just yesterday it was Valentine's Day and my wife was calling me at work with a "Guess what?" question. (When I said Valentine's Day, you thought I was going somewhere else, didn't you? For shame.)

Sometime over the last 8+ months I've come to terms with the fact that I'm going to be a father (though the prospect continues to terrify me a little bit). We've had ultrasounds, doctor's appointments, prepared the nursery, had a baby shower, installed a car seat and thrown around possible names (only a bare few we seem to agree on). And now we're in the home stretch. Next week at this time, I will most likely have joined the ranks of fatherhood.

So for any of you father's out there, if you have any words of wisdom to impart......now is most definitely the time.

Expanded Horizons

2006-09-17T21:07:00.000-04:00

As one of the perks of my current employment status, I've recently been afforded the opportunity to see and do things that in the normal course of events I never would. For example, this past week I had the chance to attend the opera.

Yes. The opera.

In any normal circumstance I wouldn't have any desire to see the opera, nor would I be able to afford it. However, I am of an open mind, and given that I was in a position where I didn't have to pay I thought, what the heck?

The Opera in question is Die Walkure which is the 2nd part in a 16 or so hour opera commonly referred to as The Ring Cycle by Richard Wagner (pronounced Vagner). This particular opera was serving to open the Canadian Opera Company's newly minted Four Seasons Centre of Performing Arts in Toronto. I heard it referred to as the Superbowl of Operas.

If by that they mean a hyped-up, long drawn out disappointing event in which the best part is the intermissions.......then yes, I concur.

Granted, I only watched one act of Die Walkure (my partner seemed to take to it a bit more than I, so I conceded him the 'privilege' of about 5 hours of it), but it became quickly apparent that it wasn't for me. I really gave it a go, though, because the story was right up my alley. Gods, heros, sword fights, etc. Not to mention it was directed by Atom Egoyan, a film director whose movies I've enjoyed. But, at the end of the day, the singing drove me nuts.

I'm sure opera singers are very talented, but to my uncultured ear, a happy bellow sounds the same as a sad bellow or an angry bellow. In truth, I don't think anyone really likes the opera. People have just been trained to think that appreciating the opera makes you smart and sophisticated, and gives you the ability to talk snootily. For example:

[with thick British accents]

Chap 1: [clapping] A fine performance. Bravo!

Chap 2: Magnificent. Truly magnificent.

Chap 1: I quite enjoyed the staging. And the voices....exquisite.

Chap 2: Verily, I must agree.

Chap 1: Shall we retire for some tea and crumpets?

Chap 2: May we use the fine china, holding it delicately whilst extending our pinky fingers?

Chap 1: Just so!

Chap 2: Then count me in, good sir.

I don't know. Perhaps people really do enjoy it. I just don't understand why. Much in the same way I don't understand why people like musicals. For the love of God, why musicals? I'm not trying to bash the theatre.....I like the theatre.....just not musicals. I don't even like the musical montages in The Family Guy.....they piss me off. Unless the singing is part of the story (i.e. Walk The Line), then let's leave the singing for the radio.

But maybe that's just me.

It's Funny Because It's True

2006-09-16T16:00:00.000-04:00

Addendum

2006-09-16T14:43:00.000-04:00

Okay....so it's time to update the list. (Not to be confused with The List).

*Let me just say that watching Sarah McLachlan perform from backstage, about 15 feet from where she sat at the piano, was awesome. Her voice was flawless, and she is surrounded by an aura that makes her absolutely stunning.

The Greatest Movies Ever Made.....

2006-09-10T17:14:00.000-04:00

....that I've seen*. In my opinion. No particular reason. Just because. Some funny, some thought provoking, all good. At least to me. But as they say, there's no accounting for taste. ;)

Braveheart
The Crow
Lost in Translation
American Beauty
Seven
The Thin Red Line
Office Space
Napoleon Dynamite
Grosse Point Blank
Forces of Nature
Playing By Heart
The Matrix
Star Wars: Episodes IV to VI
American History X
Spiderman (and 2)
Super Troopers (not to be confused with Starship Troopers)
Bad Santa
Band of Brothers (yes...it's a miniseries, not a movie. Whatever)
The Professional
Almost Famous
Memento
Legends of the Fall
A Guy Thing
Suicide Kings

* I've probably forgotten some. Undoubtedly.

Decisions, Decisions

2006-09-09T08:28:00.000-04:00

Serious consideration has been given lately to replacing our old desktop computer (on which I write) with a new laptop. We've decided on a laptop not because we need excessive mobility, but to reduce on clutter (get rid of the desk) and the idea of not having to be chained to one corner of the house. The problem now is, I'm not sure exactly what to get. I've been seriously looking into and considering an Apple Macbook (or Pro) even though I'm an old PC guy.

What is prompting this possible defection? I suppose it's the fact that Mac's are said to be more secure (i.e. viruses, spyware, etc) and it seems that Mac users are fanatically loyal, whereas you only ever hear PC users complaining about the problems they have with their systems. So let's break it down.

Apple Macbook (or Macbook Pro)

Pros

Increased security - fewer (no) problems with viruses, adware, spyware, etc
Testimonials - people who have Macs love them
iSight - webcam and microphone built into screen frame
iLife - comprehensive media package (iMusic, iPhotos, iWeb, iDVD, iChat)
Sleek design - they're purty

Cons

Price - Macs tend to be more expensive
Knowledge - Would need to familiarize myself with a new operating system
Compatability - no video/audio chat available with MSN at this time (AOL/Yahoo work)

So....I'm looking for some input if anyone has any. And for your viewing enjoyment......

Lazy

2006-09-08T23:17:00.000-04:00

Dear Readership (yes, both of you),

I've been delinquent in my blogging frequency. I could offer up a multitude of excuses for this, but in the end it boils down to laziness. I wasn't quite sure how to overcome the lull. Until tonight.

As is my routine, I took the dog for a walk after supper this evening. In truth, it's more the dog's routine than mine, but by default it has become mine*. Along our customary route, I spotted a girl leaving her house dressed in a Sobey's (grocery store) uniform, presumably on her way to work. I then watched her get into her car and drive to work.

When I say I watched her drive to work, I mean exactly that. From Point A (her house) to Point B (Sobey's), her vehicle never left my sight. I estimate that door to door, the distance from home to her workplace is approximately 150 metres/yards.

Puzzled, I tried to run through my head possible scenarios which would explain this. The only one that was remotely plausible was that it was for security reasons assuming her shift ends at a late hour. However, given the distance and the fact that we're not exactly in a high crime area, I still don't quite get it. I am left to assume that the true reason is sheer laziness.

Given this new perspective, my blogging truancy doesn't seem quite so bad. Does it?

*TANGENT:

Joanna: "Hey, what were you guys celebrating last night?"
Peter: "Oh, uh, I'm not really at liberty to talk about it. (She looks at him) I really can't. (Still looking) Alright, so when the sub routine compounds the interest, right, it uses all these extra decimal places that get rounded off. So we simplified the whole thing and we just-- we round 'em all down and drop the remainder into an account that we opened."
Joanna: "So, you're stealing."
Peter: "Uh, no. No, you don't understand. It's uh-- it's very complicated. It's uh-- it's aggregate, so I'm talking about fractions of a penny here. And, uh, over time they add up to a lot."
Joanna: "Oh, okay. So, you're gonna make a lot of money, right?"
Peter: "Yeah."
Joanna: "Right? That's not yours?"
Peter: "Uh, well, it becomes ours."
Joanna: "How is that not stealing?"

-Office Space-

The Tree

2006-08-31T21:55:00.000-04:00

Every so often I stand in the breakfast nook of my kitchen and gaze out the window which looks out on my front yard. Peering over the crest of the overgrown globe cedars which threaten to devour my view, I gaze upon the tree that those who owned the house before me decided to plant.

Is that not the sorriest looking tree you've ever seen? I feel like I should be wrapping a blue blankey around it like Linus in A Charlie Brown Christmas. Will it look better if I shower it with love? Does anyone even know what kind of tree it is? Honestly, I'm clueless. If you happen to be an expert when it comes to coniferous or deciduousness, please feel free to drop me a line, because quite frankly, I don't even know if it's SUPPOSED to look like that.

However, I think I did figure out why they decided to plant a tree in the middle of my postage stamp sized front lot. Take one generous sidestep to the right. There you go.

Remember that time....when we watched Gymkata....about the dude with wicked skills in Gymnastics and Ninjitsu....that was Awesome!

2006-08-20T21:28:00.000-04:00

The memory is a funny thing.

Have you ever remembered seeing a movie that you thought was really cool when you saw it a long time ago, and then upon seeing it again question your own sanity? Or worse.....did you talk up this movie to friends, saying things like, "You've got to see this movie. It's AWESOME!" And through your insistence, you were able to get them to sit down with you and watch said movie, only to realize about 10 minutes in that you've made a grave mistake.

I have.

Twice.

In both instances, the unfortunate saps who listened to me were my buddies Cory and Daryn. The offending movies were Gymkata and Prayer of the Rollerboys.

Seriously....what was I thinking?

Of course, every once in a while memory serves you correctly, such as in the case of Playing By Heart which I just located at MusicWorld a few days ago (after repeated searches of DVD racks in stores across Canada). I'm glad I have it to add to my collection. It's worth checking out.

Really. It's way better than Gymkata.

Now That's Unfortunate

2006-08-20T11:08:00.000-04:00

Lately, the wife and I have been discussing possible names for our soon-to-be addition to the family. It reminds me of how important it is to pick a good name that hopefully won't result in your child being the butt of jokes and so forth. It is also probably wise to consider the context of the name in other cultures.

For example, I was at a Tim Horton's near the airport in Toronto about a week ago and saw an East Indian lady working the drive-thru. As I glanced at her nametag, this is what I saw:

MANHOOR

Whoa. That's a pretty unfortunate name, I thought to myself. Kids in the playground could have a field day with that one. I thought for certain that I had misread, so I paid careful attention the next time she came around. Turns out I was right......it wasn't MANHOOR at all.

It was MAHNOOR.

Yeah. No joke to be made there.

Me And My Peeps

2006-08-17T00:18:00.000-04:00

Attention!

This is an emergency broadcast of The Greatest Blog Ever Written. You are instructed to proceed directly to the following site:

25peeps.com

If you see this picture......

....click on it.

Don't ask questions.

Do it.

Hey, isn't that....???

2006-08-14T22:28:00.000-04:00

Being from the small city of Sudbury, Ontario, where the claim to fame is being the birthplace of Alex Trebek, celebrity sighting was never something that I was ever exposed to.

With my job these days, however, I at times find myself rubbing shoulders with people I never would have guessed I'd see anywhere other than on television or the silver screen (or on a stage from a distance). This past weekend alone, I was in contact with:

Bill Gates
Richard Gere
Sandra Oh
Alicia Keyes
Chantal Kreviazuk
Raine Maida

And let's not forget her and these two.

I'm not the kind of guy to stand in awe of celebrities. They are just people, after all. Nonetheless, it is pretty cool to be in the presence of people who are so well-known.

I Know That Guy

2006-08-13T08:52:00.000-04:00

Let's try and push those maggots a little further down the page, shall we?

I was working yesterday....standing outside the main entrance to the Toronto Zoo, dressed in too many layers of clothing and baking in the heat. As I stood around waiting (which my job provides plenty of opportunity to do), I started to watch people coming and going from the zoo. After about an hour of this, I saw him.

[squint]

Heeeeey........that's KENNY!!!

[beat]

[beat]

Who the hell is Kenny? I know him, but I can't remember how I know him. But I think he's from the Sudbury area. I think my sister knows him.

Kim.......who is Kenny?

Also, I saw someone who looked like Dustin Diamond (Screech from Saved By The Bell) downtown. It probably wasn't him, but I just thought I'd share that.

And some paparazzi asked me if I was guarding anyone important, because he was waiting to snap a shot of Mariah Carey. I tried to catch his nose in my power window, but he was too quick.

Back to work.

The Two Things That Scared The Crap Out Of Me Today

2006-08-09T20:54:00.000-04:00

I like to consider myself a relatively brave and courageous guy who doesn't let too much rattle him.

Well maybe when a big spider lands on me without my knowing, and then when I turn my head to look over my shoulder I see it crawling towards my face. That might rattle me a little.

And I suppose getting up on a high ladder. Or a plane.

Maybe my friend Cory's driving would do it too.

Okay...so maybe I'm a bit of a chicken. So imagine my surprise and horror at what I encountered today. There I was, taking some garbage out to the garage. A relatively uneventful chore.

Most days.

I flipped the lid of the trash can and saw this:

SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP! I don't know if I actually said that. It may have been more along the lines of:

EEYYAAARRGGGHHHHHHHH! *flings garbage can lid away*

It's not really something you expect to see when you open your trusty Rubbermaid container; a seething, roiling mountain of MAGGOTS! If you are looking for a way to make a grown man lose his sh!t in a hurry, I suggest that that is a very good way to do it. Seriously. I ran to get my digital camera to take a picture, but by the time I got back they had all scurried to the bottom of the can like Vampires fleeing sunlight. And the batteries of my camera were dead.

And don't even get me started on the smell. I'm not sure if this whole episode was the result of the chicken bones, the cobbs of corn, or the baggies of dog excrement (a virtual pot-pourri, I know), but whatever was the cause, maggots were the result. So I spent the next hour trying to clean the mess, a task which included dumping a bunch of garbage on my driveway and unleashing a sea of white, squirming parasites. Luckily, most of my neighbours have jobs so weren't around late on a Wednesday morning. Otherwise, property values may have plummetted.

So there you have it....luckily I didn't retch. Oh....I said there were two things that scared the crap out of me today, didn't I? The other one happened when I walked into one of the upstairs bedrooms in my house.

Holy Furniture for Infants, Batman! I'm gonna be a Dad.

At least that's a good fear, and I won't have to deal with bad smells and filthy garbage and crawling...............

Expect the Unexpected

2006-08-08T16:36:00.000-04:00

Ahem. *cough* Uh...yeah...hi....my name is Dave, and I watch Big Brother.

Okay. There. I said it.

Now I need to say something else.

What the hell is wrong with these houseguests that they haven't turfed Dr. Evil yet? Were they sick the day they showed Season 2 in Houseguest school? Now don't get me wrong, I love watching Will play. In truth, I'm rooting for him to win (and I think he has a very good shot at that at this point). Seriously, who is more entertaining to watch than Mr. "Circuitry and Wires". And yet, I'm forced to laugh at the others in the house who don't see him as a threat.

But I think I get it.

This is Big Brother All-Stars. So every fool who walked into the house thinks that they are the best player ever to play the game and count themselves smarter than the rest of their housemates. The fact of the matter remains though, that Will is the only one in the house to have actually WON the game. I'm sure they're telling themselves that they'll keep him around for the final 2 so they will win the money since Will already won. But that's stupid. If I were on the jury, I'd still vote for Will to win.

And enough already of Benedict "James" Arnold's crying about Season 6 and Janelle's nomination of Diane. If I recall, James spent his week as HoH trying to oust "Chicken" George, and ultimately ended up getting rid of Jase. Boohoohoo. If he wanted Will or Boogie gone, he should have nominated them. And the bit about how his nominations were for the team and Janelle's were for herself......I seem to doubt that James would do anything that went against his self interest, even if that interest turned out to be keeping his own alliance happy (in which he is owed the least loyalty).

"Chicken" George? Really? Was he a threat? The dude thinks he's still on Season One and trying to win by impressing "America".

Will has the right mentality. It's a game. Have fun with it. Shake things up. Always keep them guessing.

That's why he's dangerous....and I would have booted him first.

The Ripples Continue

2006-08-06T07:43:00.000-04:00

I was going to post something else this morning, but I've been pleasantly distracted. Given that, I am left with no viable alternative but to once again plug the current projects of Jessica Stover.

If you read this blog, that should not be an unfamiliar name to you. I've mentioned her site on a previous occassions. You might remember my reference to The Demand. Have you demanded a screening of Jessica's movie project TSL in your city yet? No? Why the hell not?

You disappoint me.

Anyway, you might be thinking to yourself, "Why is Dave babbling on about Jessica Stover.....AGAIN!?". Well, it's because she's just relaunched her site with a new redesign and more information and concept art for her movie project. I implore you to go and check it out, and dare you not to be impressed.

So click on the picture and go forth to JSDC.

And then go demand a screening.

Yes...now.

Edit: Image removed for purposes of copyright. Click on the link to discover the graphic awesomeness at JSDC for yourself. (Seriously....just click. It's not that hard.)

Allyoucaneatism

2006-07-29T00:03:00.000-04:00

I have made a discovery which I wish to share with you, dear Reader.

Buffets are the Devil.

It's true. They are beacons of temptation, just waiting to unleash their evil upon you.

We decided to head out for dinner tonight, because neither Tam or I felt any burning desire to cook. In truth, the entire day had been pretty much a colossal waste, so we figured there was no use in trying to salvage it. To heighten the laziness, we just went down the road to the local Chinese place. If you haven't guessed by now....it had a buffet.

I have a habit of overeating in this kind of situation, but I figured this time, I could beat it. I wasn't really that hungry. I drank numerous glasses of water to "fill up".

Unfortunately, it is widely theorized that a male encountering a buffet will instinctually eat as much as possible in order to tip the cost vs. food value scale in his favour. It is deeply coded in the DNA.

I ate until it hurt. Then I ate some more. And squeezed in a bowl of soup. And some ice cream....and a cookie....and some chocolatey-thingie. I felt sick.

It wasn't my fault. It's genetic.

I even got a fortune cookie. You tend to express yourself passionately and courageously. WTF? That's not a fortune. That's a statement. And no lottery numbers.

I guess you get what you pay for.

Two Days on the Prairie

2006-07-28T14:29:00.001-04:00

I've been back for a couple of days, but between work and catching up on some much needed rest, I haven't really had the opportunity to post anything until now. My trip out west for the funeral was quick and physically draining. It went something like this.

Monday

5:00 a.m. EDT

My alarm goes off. I swing my feet to the floor and rub my eyes. These next two days are going to suck.

7:00 a.m. EDT

After my 40 minute commute, I arrive at work. I doddle around for about 2 hours, checking email, chatting with co-workers, and doing a few housekeeping items. Around 9:00 a.m. I leave the office en route to London, Ontario via car.

11:15 a.m. EDT

I arrive in London. I decide it's a good idea to fill up with gas so I don't have to do it when I get back. After paying for the fuel, I begin looking for a copy of the Globe & Mail to read while I wait, but apparently, they don't read The Globe in London. Seeing as it will probably be a while before I get a chance to eat again, I head for an early lunch at Wendy's. Around noon, I head off towards the RCMP Air Services hangar at the airport.

1:00 p.m. EDT

After waiting around for about an hour, meeting the 4 other passengers and pilot, and loading up the aircraft, we head out on our journey for Regina, Saskatchewan.

5:00 p.m. MT

Six hours, one stop for fuel in Thunder Bay, and a relatively uneventful (but cramped) flight later, we arrive at Regina Airport. I catch a ride to the Delta Hotel downtown and get checked in. My stomach has started to feed on itself as I haven't eaten in about 8 or 9 hours (which usually only happens when I'm sleeping). I try calling my buddy Don, but unfortunately, it doesn't look like he's going to make it to Regina from Saskatoon that evening as his boss has him working. We decide to try and meet for breakfast the following morning. I call another friend, Dean, who already is in the midst of cooking dinner, but will meet me for a few drinks later.

6:30 p.m. MT

I decide to head down to the Cornwall Centre with the intention of just grabbing something quick at the food court. I forget that in Saskatchewan, they roll up the sidewalks at 6 p.m. Everything is closed. I head down Scarth Street and grab a seat on the patio at Alfredo's. The sun is hot and the service is slow. The ambience sucks. I order a lasagne and side caesar salad. The salad comes first, and I start picking away at it. Are those anchovies? Bleah....but I keep picking away at it. Is that a dead, smushed fly on that piece of romaine? Okay....I'm done. When the waitress comes back, I point out the fly.

Waitress: Do you want another one?
Me: Uh....no....just remove it from my bill.
Waitress: Okay.

No apology, of course. Sigh. The lasagne, at least, is edible. I have to eat quickly, since Dean is picking me up shortly.

7:30 p.m. MT

Dean picks me up at the hotel, and we head off to Brewster's for a couple drinks. The place is packed, since it's also wing night, so we each order a pound of those as well. As usual, the place is teeming with cops and cadets, given the proximity to both the F Division headquarters and the training academy. I spot the Sergeant Major, who I know, and share a few words. He tells me I'll be in the #1 Troop for the processional the next day, which is comprised of troopmates and co-workers. I thank him, then return to my conversation with Dean and we continue getting caught up on what's going on in each other's lives. It ends up being a lot of shop talk....but that's what happens when cops get together.

10:00 p.m. MT

We decide to take advantage of the theatre located outside the pub and go see the late screening of Clerks II. I find the first 10 minutes or so a bit annoying, but it picks up, and by the end of it I've had to wipe away tears of laughter on more than one occassion. Crude, but enjoyable. But as with the first Clerks....Dante still gets on my nerves.

12:30 a.m. MT

Dean drops me off back at the hotel. I watch a bit of the Daily Show, then pass out.

Tuesday

7:00 a.m. MT

I wake up earlier than anticipated and before my alarm. I decide there's not much point in going back to sleep. After a quick shower and shave, I take a bit of time to add a few coats of polish to my boots. Don gives me a call just before 9, saying he's almost in town. I tell him I'll meet him down at the restaurant in the mall.

9:15 a.m. MT

I meet Don and one of his co-workers, Brent, for breakfast. It's good to see Don again. We start chatting like it's old times. I remember why I miss working with him. Once finished, we head up to my room so they don't have to change for the funeral in their car.

11:30 a.m. MT

All dressed up and ready to go, we head downstairs to the lobby where I'm meeting my ride. I see a couple guys from Toronto's 52 Division, and say hello. Don and Brent head out, and my ride arrives shortly after. We head over to the exhibition grounds where people have been asked to park and be bused over to Depot for the service. I see a number of old friend's and co-workers there, catch up briefly, and then hop a bus over to Depot.

12:30 p.m. MT

I arrive at Depot to a sea of red and blue. I can't walk five feet without bumping into a former co-worker or acquaintance. It is good to see everyone again, but it's hard to adequately catch-up in two minutes. I head over to the staging area for the processional, and find my old co-workers from Pelican Narrows. We catch up. I learn that there was a prayer service the previous evening, which some of them attended and then had a few drinks after. They tried to call me, but I wasn't in the hotel room. I regret not having known. We stand around for well over an hour as the column is organized and we await the body and family to arrive.

2:00 p.m. MT

The procession begins. We fall in behind the hearse and horses, marching through the parade square and in front of the Chapel. Our troop was told we'd be seated in the Chapel, but with all the Officers, apparently there was no room for us...who knew Marc. So we were marched over to the drill hall, where we watched the service on closed circuit t.v. It was hard to watch, at times. For a time, seated in front of me, was the 3rd Mountie who came on the scene, exchanged gunfire with the dirtbag, and then came upon her friends and co-workers, shot in the head with a rifle. You could see the emotional toll she had been forced to pay etched on her face. There were touching words from the Commissioner, Marc's aunt, and his brothers. Natasha spoke as well. I am inspired by the courage she has shown in dealing with this terrible ordeal....the loss of her husband and father of their 9 month old son.

Following the service, the 1000+ officers in attendance formed a line of honour leading from the Chapel out through the parade square and to Dewdney Avenue. As the hearse passed, each officer would snap a salute. We were then broken off, and I had a chance to meet with people for another 1/2 hour or so, before having to head back to the van, and subsequently the airport for our flight back.

18:15 p.m. MT

We grabbed a couple sandwiches for the flight, then made our way to the hangar where we undertook the task of changing out of our uniforms. Then it was back on the plane, for the lovely ride home.

1:30 a.m. EDT

Six hours, one stop for fuel in Thunder Bay, and a flight outrunning a lightning storm later, we land in London. I have another 2-2 1/2 hour drive ahead of me to look forward to. I stop at a Tim Horton's for a coffee and sandwich, and make the trek home.

4:00 a.m. EDT

Bed. Sleep. And dreams of better times.

Away

2006-07-24T05:58:00.000-04:00

I will be away for a couple days, as I head out to Saskatchewan to attend one of these.

YouTest

2006-07-23T15:21:00.000-04:00

I decided to try and embed a YouTube video on my blog. What better video to use than a video of Matthew Good and Melissa McClelland performing Hurt on his acoustic tour. I saw this performed live, and it gave me goosebumps.

Do you remember?

Enjoy.

Old Cars and Secret Identities

2006-07-22T23:26:00.000-04:00

Today the wife and I decided to head over to the Classic Car Exhibition taking place at the Barrie Event Centre. I'm not the kind of guy who's particularily mechanically inclined, so under normal circumstances, this isn't likely the place you'd find me on a Saturday afternoon. However, we were motivated by the fact that my father-in-law was in attendance with the Sudbury Street Rod Association showing off his work in progress, a 1933 Ford Coupe. Here are a few choice pictures from our little excursion.

The black hotrod with the orange engine work is the ride belonging to my father-in-law.

Sweet.

Yeah.....I could see myself in that.

Okay...so when I was a young lad, I decided that the Corvette Stingray was my dream car. I was going to own one. It would be black. The license plate would say SHADOW. Because that was going to be my superhero/crimefighter name. The Shadow. Not like the actual The Shadow with the ghey red scarf. I'd be more like Sylvester Stallone in Cobra. When I was young....Cobra was the epitome of cool.

Yes....I was a geek. Please withhold any comments to that effect. And buy me a Stingray....so I can fight crime in style.

Seriously....you can't fight crime in a Toyota Tercel.

On Proximity

2006-07-20T19:53:00.001-04:00

Like a climber
lost in the mountains
i dream
only of sleeping

-Life Beyond the Minimum Safe Distance by The Matthew Good Band-

A confluence of events in the past two weeks has forced upon me a period of introspection and thought. The events in question have set me to thinking about proximity and how it plays on the emotional toll these events have on us.

The crisis in the Middle East is deeply troubling. Afghanistan. Iraq. Iran. Now the Israeli-Lebanese conflict. The region is in turmoil. Hundreds are dying every day. I watch the news, read the papers, see the pictures. It is all very tragic. And yet, as I take it all in, I feel very detached from what is happening over there. While my mind denounces the violence and finds the entire situation appalling, I am relatively unmoved emotionally. It is just another terrible thing happening somewhere else in the world. Over there. Not here. Not in Canada. I care....but it does not touch me. It is too far. The bombs are not devastating my country....my home....my family. What could I possibly do? It is not so much a feeling of apathy, as impotency. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Bringing it closer to home, I received news on July 10th that on July 7th, my former co-worker and neighbour, Constable Marc Bourdages was shot on-duty in Mildred, Saskatchewan. Also shot was his partner, Constable Robin Cameron. On the evening of July 16th, 2006, both Marc and Robin succumbed to their injuries.

I don't know if I can adequately describe what I've been feeling with words. I had not seen or spoken with Marc since March of 2005. I left Saskatchewan in June of 2005, and now live in Ontario. When I heard the news, I felt what can only be described as disbelief. It didn't feel real. As it sunk in, I felt deeply saddened as when any police officer dies in the line of duty, moreso given my personal connection, but I still felt oddly detached. From what sprang this emptiness....this lack of emotion? Was it shock? I feel terrible. I feel a loss. But I am not shaken. I stare at his picture repeatedly, hoping to be taken by some sense of overwhelming grief....but it does not come. Perhaps it is just my way. I have never been known to be especially emotional. I can probably count on one hand the times in my life I have actually cried, and have fingers to spare.

That being said, they held a news conference the morning after they passed. There were no cameras, but I heard the audio, and Natasha, Marc's wife, a fellow Constable, and also a friend and former co-worker of mine, spoke to the media. As I heard her voice, the distance closed. I felt like I had been punched in the gut. In that time....it started to feel real. Since then, I've started to feel a bit detached again. Is it because Marc and I were always friendly, but not necessarily friends? Is it because we parted on slightly bitter terms? Or is it because I'm here...and this happened there? Would it strike closer to home if I were still living and working in Saskatchewan? I think it would.

On Monday, I fly out to the funeral which is taking place at the RCMP training facility (Depot) in Regina, SK. The distance I've experienced for the last 2 weeks will be negated. I will see old friends who also worked with Marc. I will see his family. I will see Natasha. Perhaps I will see his 9 month old son.

I will be a mess.

And then other things strike you closer still. Something that might happen. Something that you never plan for. Something that could profoundly alter your life. Something that will test you and see how strong you really are. The details are personal. Those that need to know, do. All that is left to do is stay positive, and hope that everything will work out.

What else can you do?

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.

-Reinhold Niebuhr-

Loss

2006-07-16T11:07:00.000-04:00

Two Mounties shot in Sask. have died: report

Updated Sun. Jul. 16 2006 11:02 AM ET

CTV.ca News Staff

Both members of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police who were shot on July 7 in Saskatchewan have died.

The Canadian Press, citing sources in the Prime Minister's Office, reported the tragic development.

The RCMP has not confirmed the report, but a news conference is scheduled for 12 p.m. ET.

The Mounties, constables Robin Cameron, 29, and Marc Bourdages, 26, were shot near the small farming community of Mildred, Sask. as they pursued a suspect.

Both officers were taken to hospital in Saskatoon, where they both underwent extensive surgery for their injuries.

Curtis Dagenais, 41, is still wanted in connection with the shooting.

The two Mounties and a third officer were responding to a report that an assault had taken place at about 9 p.m. on July 7.

The suspect in the assault fled in a vehicle, and the officers pursued him, but were reportedly fired on when the man stopped.

The third officer returned fire on the suspect, but it is not known if he was struck.

The suspect then fled the scene on foot.

Since then, police have carried out a massive, so far unsuccessful manhunt for Dagenais, the suspected shooter.

Police now suggest Dagenais may have fled the province or died while hiding in the forest. His father, Arthur Dagenais, worries his son may have taken his own life.

In March 2005, four RCMP officers were shot and killed in Mayerthorpe, Alta. by James Roszko while they were on his property to investigate stolen parts and a marijuana grow operation. Roszko then took his own life.

It's a Bird. AND a Plane!

2006-07-16T10:35:00.000-04:00

Random shot while sitting in the parking lot at the Radisson by the Toronto Airport.

To Kill A Stinging Wasp

2006-07-14T22:53:00.000-04:00

Do you see that!? Do you see what happened there?! I got stung by a wasp. A WASP! A guy can't even mow his lawn in peace without being assaulted by the insectoid masses.

Ow! That flippin' hurt.

But I survived.

Know who didn't? The black and yellow banes of my existence who decided to take up residence inside the hollow bar of the gate in my backyard.

BIG MISTAKE!!!

How do you like being saturated with "Wasp, Hornet and every other Nasty Bug you can think of" repellent? What's that? I can't hear you. You're DEAD!!

Victory is sweet.

A Pebble in a Pond

2006-07-10T13:41:00.001-04:00

Brother-in-law Steve asks:

"What's the deal with the Eventful Demand for Jessica Mae Stover thing on your blog?"

Steve has already received the short version during a beer and grocery run, but I think a more detailed explanation may be necessary, so here it is.

Have you ever wondered why we're constantly forced to endure endless sequels and remakes at the movies rather than being offered original material that is undoubtedly out there? Why are they making King Kong instead of searching for the next Star Wars? I ask myself these questions all the time, and I'm not alone.

As I've mentioned before, I've taking to reading the blog/website of Jessica Stover. She is a actress/screenwriter/performer from Virginia but currently living in Los Angeles. She used to have a show on America On-Line (AOL) in which she would interview such celebrities as George Lucas, Samuel L. Jackson, and others. I enjoy reading her blog, and even purchased her book Aidmheil which was a collection of blog posts, poetry and short story. She has written a screenplay for a fantasy genre trilogy that requires a relatively big-budget treatment to help bring it to life. Feedback on the screenplay has been good, but Hollywood doesn't like taking chances. They'd rather make The Dukes of Hazard than take a chance on an original idea. Star Wars was an original idea. Can you imagine if Episodes IV through VI had not been made?

So, what is there to be done? The fans of Jessica Stover Dot Com (JSDC) have started a grassroots campaign via Eventful. It is a website where you can make a demand for a performer to come to your community and perform. When enough interest is generated, Eventful contacts the performer and lets them know that there is a big demand for them to go to location X. With JSDC, a demand has been made for a screening of Jessica's screenplay (codename: TSL) in various cities in an effort to show the Hollywood executives that there is a demand for this kind of project and people willing to part with their hard-earned money to see it brought to the big screen. To see the project in Jessica's own words, check out her recent entry on the subject.

Done reading it? What do you think? Pretty cool? I think so. So why don't you help us out. Click on the banner and go and make a demand for TSL to have a screening in YOUR city. Not there? Add it. Then pass it on. Tell your friends. Put a banner on your website. Email your contacts. Can you think of something else you can do? Do it. The goal is to reach 100,000 demands. It is possible. The Internet makes it possible.

This is a revolution. Aren't you interested to see if we, the viewers, can have an impact on what movies are made? Maybe someday all the screenplays received by studios will be posted on a website with a synopsis and we can choose what movies are eventually made. Maybe then, people would start going back to the theatre.

So.....are you in? Ready to help?

Blogosphere.......activate!

&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;a href="http://not-a-real-namespace/http://eventful.com/performers/P0-001-000001900-7/demand"&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;Demand Jessica Mae Stover in your city with eventful.com!&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;

Mortality

2006-07-10T12:30:00.000-04:00

"Officials have released the names of two RCMP officers shot in Saskatchewan, while police continue to search for the gunman.
Const. Robin Cameron, 29, and Const. Marc Bourdages were shot Friday night near the small farming community of Mildred. The town is located about 140 kilometres west of Prince Albert. (ctv.ca)"
more

Since I've been away on holidays, I just heard about this three days after the fact. Marc was my co-worker and neighbour for about a year and a half while I worked in northern Saskatchewan. He and his partner are currently listed as being in serious condition. Our thoughts and prayers are with them and their families.

If I Were On South Park......

2006-07-08T13:21:00.000-04:00

Cool, eh?

Knees of Flame

2006-07-02T22:39:00.000-04:00

At present, my knees are a fabulous shade of red. They look embarrassed. But the truth of the matter is, I sat out in the sun too long yesterday. I trekked up to Honey Harbour to visit some of the family who were staying at the Elm Cove Cottages. My dad and I took a little canoe tour around the bay, and shared some food drinks and conversation while sitting out on the deck. Apparently, I decided not to wear the sunscreen that I brought with me (you know....to protect me from the sun), and ended up with a funny looking sunburn and a mild case of heatstroke. By the time I got home I was exhausted, was beginning to feel a little queasy, and could fry an egg on my knees. I was in good shape.

I've also been fighting some manner of ear infection/sinus congestion/sore throat/hacking cough which helped me acquire a reservation on the basement couch to sleep for the night. (It would seem a hacking cough is even more disruptive than my snoring.) So, after snapping my spine back into alignment, I got up and rustled up some of my world famous omelettes. After breakfast, it was time for some more home ~~aggrevations~~ renovations. We're still dealing with the grouting fiasco, and will probably need to head to Home Depot tomorrow to try and find a solution to our discolouration. On the up side, with the help of the wife's uncle, we were able to get our bathroom door installed and the trim for that door painted and secured. Score.

As I write this, my dog has just come up from where he was cowering alone in the dark basement. It's Canada Day weekend, you see......and he's freakishly afraid of fireworks.....or at least the loud noises associated with them. He's one of the most bizarre and skittish creatures I've ever come across, but that's part of his charm, I guess. I'm just glad he's home and safe, unlike the unfortunate situation currently being faced by popular blogger Magazine Man, who's tragic tale to date can be viewed
here(1), here(2) and here(3).

My boring account of recent events is at an end. Right........now.

Superman Returns: The Review

2006-06-30T21:16:00.000-04:00

Okay. As you may have surmised by my previous post, I attended an advance screening of Superman Returns. The only other advance screening I've ever seen was Rocky IV (which, ironically enough, also features a "hero" in red and blue returning after an abscence). Those tickets I think came by way of a fellow who lived above us and worked at a radio station. In this instance, I just bought the tickets. I didn't feel quite as special this time....and didn't get a cool headband.

Anyway, it's actually somewhat odd that I was in such a hurry to see Superman Returns, as I've never been a huge fan of the guy. I mean, as conveyed with comic efficiency in this post, Kal-el is kind of a hard guy to relate to. He's handsome, indestructible, can fly, burn stuff with his eyes, he's an alien. In other words, he's not like us. Add to that the somewhat predictable nature of Superman storylines; Lex Luthor gets out of prison. Lex Luthor acquires money and kryptonite. Superman catches falling pianos and derailing trains. Lex Luthor launches evil scheme. Superman interferes, is kryptonited, beaten up. Lex Luthor fails to finish the job. Superman recovers with the help of a mere mortal. Superman finds Lex Luthor and stops him, saving the day. Superman doesn't get the girl.

But, in this case, I liked what Bryan Singer did with the X-Men films, so was willing to take a chance. And I wanted to avoid reading all the reviews and make my own determination as to the merits and flaws of the film. As of this writing, I'm still unspoiled, as it were. So here's my take on the film, hopefully without spoilers.

I was glad that Singer decided not to do an origin film. Everyone knows the origin story for Superman. Everyone who hasn't been living under a rock for the last 30 years, anyway. Unfortunately, with the exception of a few minor plot twists that were inserted along the way, Singer didn't stray very far from the Superman story formula, and I found that a bit dissappointing. It's a major design flaw in the Superman story that his only real vulnerability is to kryptonite. In order to have any sort of drama or danger for your hero, the green rock has to enter the equation. It gets old. Some of the other elements of the story had potential, but weren't explored in any depth.

The first major action sequence in the film is phenomenal, assisted by the spectacular special effects. They did a really good job in that department. I have to add as well that the casting of Brandon Routh was inspired. While he doesn't quite measure up to Christopher Reeve (who would), he does an admirable job. Singer was quite right to go with an unknown actor as opposed to a celebrity. I heard Nicolas Cage was one of those after the role. Thank god that didn't happen. Kevin Spacey also does a fine job as Lex, and Kate Bosworth is satisfactory as Lois Lane.

I can't say I didn't enjoy the movie. I've definitely been to worse. The first half hour was really promising, but then I saw it slide a bit as it progressed, descending into all too familiar territory. At the end of the day, I think it was just an updated version of the older Superman movies. Superman returns doesn't bring all that much new to the table, other than fresh faces and fancier special effects. If you're a big Superman fan, you'll probably really like this movie. However, if you're like me and like your heroes with a bit more vulnerability (not brought on by minerals), then hold out for Spider-man 3, the trailer for which rolled before this film (and looked totally awesome, I must say).

My rating: Myeeeah. (while teetering hand)

Conversation Overheard At An Advance Screening of Superman Returns

2006-06-28T01:28:00.000-04:00

A blonde in her teens walks up the steps towards he seat at the back of the theatre, carrying some newly acquired goodies from the (overpriced) concession stand. During her ascent, she spots a male sitting in an aisle seat and her face registers recognition.

Blonde: "Matt...hey.....what are you doing here?"

Matt: "Uh....[points at screen]...I'm here to see Superman Returns."

Blonde: "Me toooo!" [in tone denoting holy amazing coincidence]

Matt: "Uh....yeah.." [thought bubble: Idiot.]

The conversation continues, but I don't hear it. I'm too busy trying not to laugh.

Something that really gets under my skin and compels me to write a blog post about it.

2006-06-25T00:07:00.000-04:00

It has been occurring for a while now.

All around.

It hasn't gone unnoticed.

Every time I go to Tim Horton's or McDonald's or [insert random fast food chain here] I hear it.

Five words.

Five excruciating words.

"Can I help who's next?"

I beg your pardon? Is this what is being taught in English classrooms across the country these days? Is it some bastardization of language being inserted into orientation packages alongside of "Would you like fries with that?" Inquiring minds want to know, because I myself worked at a fast food chain for X* years and that particular phrase was never part of my repatoire. Instead, I went to the old standbys like:

[eye contact] "Hi, can I take your order please?"

"Hello, can I help the next person in line?"

"Good afternoon, sir, how can I help you?"

Any of these.....perfectly acceptable. "Can I help who's next?", on the other hand? You may as well just throw a couple of bling blings and hizouses at me while you're at it and really incite my rage.

Seriously.

And don't think I'm the only one who's noticed.

* Where X = more years than I care to admit.

Public Service Announcement #1

2006-06-23T16:16:00.000-04:00

Attention.

Women who shave their eyebrows and then pencil them in afterward.

You look ridiculous.

Home

2006-06-22T20:11:00.000-04:00

I'm back.

Back from my second trip to Ottawa in the last month. I'd love to regale you with stories of all the interesting sites I'd seen, and inundate you with breathtaking pictures from the nation's capital. Unfortunately....I've got nothing. The truth of the matter is, there wasn't a lot of time for a personal program, as it were. They kept us busy on the course, and any downtime was spent with tasks like sleeping....and eating....and perhaps imbibing the odd alcoholic beverage (just to be social, of course).

I can tell you this. Going on a work related trip, where expenses are covered, has it's perks. You get your bed made every morning by housekeeping. You get to eat out every night. You get to hang out with co-workers......

On the down-side, you have to sleep in a hotel, eat out every night, and hang out with co-workers.

Yeah. It gets old pretty fast. It doesn't take long before you begin to miss your wife, the dog, a home-cooked meal, your bed, the Internets.....and all the things you become accustomed to in every day life.

That's not to say that I didn't have a fantastic time. The training was great. I got to spend some time with the boys, drinking beer and watching the World and Stanley Cups, respectively. And Ottawa (at least parts of it) is a lovely city, which I wish I had more time to experience.

But yeah. I'm back. And just 1.5 days away from 17 days off.

Whatever will I do with myself?

Preemptive Blog

2006-06-10T09:06:00.000-04:00

I feel compelled to post something today, since I know it will be close to two weeks before I get the opportunity again. I am going to be away in Ottawa on a work related course, and aside from being extremely busy, I don't think I am going to have any Internet access. So, for the next two weeks at least, I have a valid excuse for not posting. ;)

The truth is, I would post a lot more if I could, but there are some things I just can't talk about due to my job as a member of the RCMP. I'd love to talk about some of the cool training I'm getting as part of the VIP Security Section. I have opinions about the Caledonia standoff (I was there) and on what people are saying about the recent terror arrests. I can't really be vocal about any political issue, as I have to retain the appearance of neutrality (which is how we have to approach our job as well).

At the end of the day, that eliminates a great deal about what I can discuss or post about in my blog. So what can I discuss?

Hmmm.....

Two days ago, we went and had our first ultrasound for the pregnancy. It was admittedly, a little surreal. Up until that point, I was still able to retain just a little bit of denial. Out of sight, out of mind, as it were. No longer. It's kind of funny, since every time I've seen an ultrasound image of a pregnancy before, I just kind of nodded and said I saw it (kind of like those pictures that are all blurry, but they tell you there's a sailboat there, and after a while you just say you see the bloody thing so they stop asking you, doyouseeit, doyouseeit, doyouseeit?), when in reality, all is saw was some obscure shapes in a bunch of static. Not so in this instance. I definitely saw a baby, and it kind of freaked me out. But....I was smiling, so I suppose it's the good sort of freaked out. I'd love to be able to post a picture, but the bloody place doesn't do pictures. We were able to dish out $20 for a VHS copy of the ultrasound though. That is really super-fantastic, since we don't have a VCR!!

Yesterday, I was a slug. I slept in, watched television, and did practically nothing all day. Very productive. We had someone come in to clean our ducts, since the airflow upstairs is brutal. We have yet to see if it had any effect, but the guy said it didn't look like they had been cleaned since the house was built 14 years ago. Not that I expected him to say, "These ducts are spotless.....we're not needed here....please keep your money sir!"

We decided to go out for dinner, being in the sluggish funk that we were and not wanting to cook. Having lived here for almost a year, we've never tried eating anywhere local, usually going to Barrie instead. So, we decided to try one of the local Chinese joints. They had a buffet, and it was pretty good. I'm glad we went. As an added bonus, my fortune cookie said, "An influential person will say something about you in a positive light.", or something to that effect. Score.

In other news, I've become my mother. When I was younger, I used to tease her about falling asleep on the couch while watching a movie, usually early in the evening. Now it's me. Two nights in a row. I'm pathetic. It's official.....my biological clock has been officially reset to adult time. Being a grown up blows.

There....that's like....4 posts in one. A little disjointed, and not my best work, but beggars can't be choosers. That should buy me a week and a half. At least. Who knows....maybe I'll even post something else today.

I'm crazy like that.

What's In A Name?

2006-06-07T20:06:00.000-04:00

I have a confession to make to you: I hate the name of my blog.

This wasn't always the case.

When I first created this blog, I wanted to get started as soon as possible, and things like choosing a name were an unfortunate obstacle. Fortunately, I was struck by a moment of inspiration. I'll call it The Greatest Blog Ever Written! Tongue in cheek, of course. To illustrate the point, I would add a clever subtitle, like ".....is unavailable at this time. We apologize for the inconvenience."

Unfortunately, a couple of weeks later I had the thought to Google that name....just out of curiousity. My worst fear was confirmed. I was original.....along with about 87 others. Sigh.

Add to that the realization that anyone seeing a link to my site only sees The Greatest Blog Ever Written, and not the witty comment following it (hell, it's hard enough to see if you actually visit the page). What are people to think?

Reader: The Greatest Blog Ever Written? WTF? I have a blog. Who does this clown think he is that he's better than me?

[click]......[reads].....[snorts]

Reader: This isn't even the greatest thing I've read today. What a moron. Oooooh.....Wil Wheaton. Let's see what Wesley Crusher's up to......

[click]

So, therein lies my dilema. I've been trying to come up with a new name ever since. Unsuccessfully, I might add. I need something catchy, witty, memorable, and apropos. How about:

Dave Grant Dot Blogspot Dot Com (DGDBDC). Too wordy. And there are about a bazillion Dave Grants (seriously....I looked it up. A bazillion. And three).

Singing Telegrams from Innisfil. Too obscure.

Adventures in a ...Chalmers...Shelter. ??????????

No. No. No. No. NO! Think big. Think original. THINK!!

[deep breath]

It's there. Swirling in the darkest corners of my brain and dammit.....the batteries in my flashlight are dying.

Anybody got a couple of D cells to spare?

Seriously.

It's getting dark in here.

You are so wrong

2006-05-23T22:48:00.001-04:00

Okay. In case you don't read the blogs that I list on my site (which you totally should, since I have impeccable taste...), I point you towards the most recent post from Paul Davidson's blog, Words For My Enjoyment. Not only is he a great writer, but he knows how to lay down the funny.

Check it out. (for the less than computer savvy, click on 'it'. You know who you are.)

screeee Price check on Ruby Slippers..!

2006-05-23T19:05:00.000-04:00

On the way home from work today, I stopped at the grocery store to pick up a few items for supper. Having just come from work, I felt a little dressed up for food shopping. Imagine my surpise when I saw Dorothy and the Gang inside.

I'm assuming one of the local high schools was putting on a play. I guess they got the munchies before the opening curtain.

Divine Wind and Emergency Lights

2006-05-22T06:57:00.000-04:00

The most fun I've had in my career as a police officer to date is a period of time in Carlyle when my buddy Don and I were partners. I'm not sure why we "clicked" as we did, but we made each other laugh. A lot. We often joked that if they ever opened up The Amazing Race to Canadians, we'd apply. If it ever happens, I may just hold him to it.

Not everyone was happy with the relationship, however. I speak specifically of the wildlife inhabiting the Carlyle area. For some reason, unbeknownst to myself, whenever we were in the police car, with myself driving and Donnie riding shotgun, Bambi and her wilderness posse would try to take us out. Our chariot was frequently the target of suicide runs by deer, cats, racoons, porcupines and just about any other manner of beast found on the Prairie.

But no single incident was quite so memorable as this:

Summer. Early evening. A rural highway slices a path through farmland and into the hills north of Carlyle. Traffic is light. In the sky over the highway, a solitary hawk soars and swoops, searching for prey. A police car races along at a speed.......greater than the speed limit, lights flashing. Within, two [handsome/dashing/noble] Mounties, on their way to pick up a special overnight guest for the Carlyle RCMP Hilton.

Dave: [driving] That bird is freaking me out, man.

Don: He'll move.

The hawk soars low over the highway.

Dave: [decelerating] He's got a bloody death wish.

After a few seconds, the bird veers away, up and to the left, out of harm's way.

Dave: There...... [hammers down on the accelerator]

He waits until the last second. The bird. Then radically alters his course, swooping back towards the highway and towards the speeding police cruiser. The Mounties wince, as it careens towards the windshield, but glides up and over the top of the glass.

THUD!

Dave: [startled] I think I hit that hawk, man!

Don: [chuckling] I think so.

Pause.

Dave: Where did it go?

Don: What?

Dave: The bloody bird! I checked the rearview mirror. I didn't see it fly away or hit the ground.

Don: Who cares? Just keep going....

Pause.

Dave: I think it's on the roof....

Don: What..?

Dave: The bird, man. I think it's on the roof! [pause] I'm pulling over.

The police cruiser slows and rolls onto the gravel shoulder, coming to a halt. Dave turns to Don.

Dave: Go check.

Don: [chuckling] What?! Why me?

Dave: Because you're on the passenger side. I'd have to step into traffic....

Don: [chuckles lightly, rolling eyes] Alright....

Don opens the door and half-steps out, his head disappearing over the roof of the car. Moments later, he returns to his seat and closes the door.

Don: [chuckling] Yep....

Dave: Yep?! Yep what?!

Don: The bird's stuck on the roof.

Dave: [in disbelief] No it's not.....

Don: [nodding] It's up there....

Dave: I don't believe you....

Don: [chuckling] Don't believe me, then.....

Dave: [incredulous] But....if it was on the roof, why wouldn't you take it off!?

Don: [shrugging shoulders, laughing] I don't know....

Dave: [rolling eyes, certain he's being HAD] I guess I'll have to check for myself......

Dave checks for traffic, then steps out of the police car to look upon the roof.

Dave: Oh my.... [gag reflex]

The back of his hand is brought up to his mouth and nose. The bird is indeed there. It's head and shoulders are wedged in the space between the light bar and the roof, a space that physics tells us is insufficient to fit the head and shoulders of a large, predatory bird. Majestic wings are spread, flapping lightly in the wind, making the creature look like some kind of bizarre, organic hood (roof) ornament. To the rear of the light bar, a trail of blood and hawkmeat is strewn, bright red against the stark white of the car's exterior.

Dave: [leaning back into the car] Why didn't you pull it off?

Don: [laughing] I don't know...

Dave: Well take it off, man. It's more on your side......

Don: [rolls eyes, still in good humour] Alright...alright...

Don steps out of the car, takes firm hold of one outstretched wing, and pulls. It doesn't come easy, but eventually is pulled from it's morbid trap. The majority of the bird is flung into the ditch, but a good part of it still decorates the car.

Don: [chuckling] Let's go.....

Don gets back in the car. Shaking his head, Dave soon follows suit. The police car rolls into motion and continues on it's journey up the highway.

At the time, being an animal lover, I was a bit mortified. Today though, we always look back on The Hawk Story in humour, given that was the first event in our "wildlife escapades", and the fact that the story didn't quite end there. There was the fact that we had to throw the guy we arrested over the trunk of the car while we handcuffed him, his face inches from the remains, but completely oblivious because he was so juiced. And then there's the fact that I got my uniform completely soaked trying to wash the car afterward, and that I continued to see a chunk of hawk on the floor of the car wash for at least two weeks afterward.

It's funny the things that stick with you. Donnie and I had many the adventure. Maybe I'll share another one sometime.

Here's to you, Donnie........

The Road Not Taken

2006-05-21T08:48:00.001-04:00

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;"

-From The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost-

Have you ever heard of the butterfly effect? It's the idea that a small initial action can have a profound effect on future events (i.e. flapping of butterfly's wings causing a tornado to form [or not form, as the case may be]). There was a movie made by the same name starring Ashton Kutcher, in which the main character is able to go back and change things in the past which tend to have a profound effect on his future (usually for the worse). There's also a good movie called Sliding Doors with Gwyneth Paltrow which examines the great difference one seemingly mundane event in her life has on the course of her life (i.e. missing the subway).

Invariably, at some point in your life, someone will ask you, "If you could go back and change one thing, what would it be?" I never quite know how to respond to this. I have a pretty good life at present, so it's hard for me to look back on anything as a "regret" and as something I'd want to change.

Sure....if I was sitting in a cell in Kingston Penitentiary, doing a life sentence for a murder rap, I might be saying to myself, "Yeah...I sure regret killing that guy. I sure wish I could go back and maybe....I dunno.....NOT kill him." That might qualify as a regret. But even still, if it were The Butterfly Effect, maybe if I hadn't killed that guy, he would have gone on to acquire a WMD and detonate it, wiping out half the eastern seaboard. Chew on that!

So would I change anything? Probably not. If our foresight was as keen as our hindsight, it might be a different story. Then again, if that were the case, the best decision could be made in the first instance, couldn't it?

Nonetheless, when people ask a question like that, it tends to lead to some retrospection. Undoubtedly, there are moments in one's life that are watersheds.....times where you come to a fork in the road, like in Frost's famous poem. These moments jump out at you. They lead to "what would my life be like today if....." type questions. Looking back, I can see at least 4 or 5 such events (of those which were of my own control) that have shaped who and where I am today. After a bit of personal deliberation, I've decided to share them.

1. The Girl Unanswered.

In the summer between Grade 5 and Grade 6, we moved. I was a popular guy in my old neighbourhood, and at my old school. I was in the "IN" crowd, insofar as you can have an "IN" crowd in Grade 5. When I started Grade 6 at my new school, it was foreign territory. There weren't many kids my age in my neighbourhood, so I went in not really knowing anyone. Luckily for me, I was darn cute and completely adorable, so people took to me like moths to a flame. Especially the girls. I guess it's that age when guys and girls are starting to notice each other and all that. I was LITERALLY being chased around the schoolyard by packs of 10-11 year old girls. In retrospect, I look back and ask myself, "Why was I running?". The reality was, I was terrified. I didn't quite know how to deal with the whole situation. I think being in a new area, new school, etc, I retreated into myself a bit, and it's when my shyness (which I've never been able to shake) really took hold.

Soon after my arrival in that Fall of 1986, I learned that K had a bit of a crush on me. K was one of the "IN" girls at the new school. Her "crowd" tried tirelessly to impress upon me her interest, and made numerous attempts to bring us together, through courtyard socialization, trying to get us to "hold hands" at the skating rink, etc. I resisted. It's not that I didn't like K. She was attractive...popular, etc. Rather, I was in the grip of fear and didn't quite know how to deal with the situation. So I ran away from it.

Eventually, they gave up on me and I found myself socializing more with The Others. The not quite as cool kids (i.e. the nerds, the geeks, the burnouts....yes...strangely enough, there were burnouts in Grade 6). There seemed to be less pressure in that peer group. There was also less co-ed mingling. It's not that I didn't like the girls....I just hadn't quite figured them out yet. We fear what we don't understand.

Looking back, I at times wonder how I, and subsequently, my life might have been different had I given in to the pressure to "date" (exaggerated quotation gesture) K. By way of this schoolyard romance, would I have developed more confidence and been more outspoken? How would a different peer group have affected my future choices as far as sports, work, occupation? Would I be the same person? Hmmmm......

2. The Clown Corporation

In 1991, amidst increasing presure from my mother, I sought a job. I found one....at McDonald's. Two of my best friends at the time already worked there, so it seemed as good a place as any to apply. I was hired in June. In December, my wife was hired. A year later, we were dating. The rest, as they say, is history.

Aside from the obvious personal impact on my life, I also spent 8 of my formative years as an employee of McDonald's, 4 of those in management. It taught me a lot of life skills and work ethic which I believe I carry with me to this day. Through that job, I also made a number of friendships, as well as solidifying some of my strongest ones which continue to this day.

And I got fat.

3. The Stay At Home Voyageur

As my high school days drew to a close in 1993-1994, I was faced with a big decision. On the one hand, Carleton University in Ottawa. On the other, Laurentian University at home in Sudbury. I'm not sure whether fear or finances played the bigger factor, but I eventually decided to stay in Sudbury. As such, I continued on at McDonald's (eventually joining the management team), probably saved a lot of money, lived at home until I was 24, and likely protected the relationship with the girl who was to become my wife. I sacrificed independance for stability. It's interesting to wonder how things might have unfolded had I gone to Ottawa on my own as an 18 year old.

4. The Westward Marcher

In February of 2000 I flew out to Regina, Saskatchewan to attend the Royal Canadian Mounted Police Training Academy. It was 5 months of gruelling training after which I earned my badge. If I had not applied and been accepted, or had I failed at the Academy, I wonder where I would be. Still at McDonald's? It's almost mind-boggling to consider, as since 2000, my life course has been shaped by the RCMP.

I was initially posted to Carlyle, a little community in the southeast of Saskatchewan, policing 11 communities and 2 First Nations Reserves. After 3 years there (our family having grown by one feline and one canine), we shipped north to Pelican Narrows, a First Nations community in northern Saskatchewan for 2 years. In our time, we made many good friends, and I was exposed to so many life and work experiences that I never would have imagined for myself. Now back in Ontario, I work in the VIP section which has put me in the presence of Prime Minister's, Presidents, and Royals. Wild.

I'm certain there are other life events and decisions which have influenced my life, but I view those as the big ones to date. I am certain that there will be many more to come(the first probably as soon as October). Who knows what the future will bring?

In answer to the question, "If you could go back and change one thing, what would it be?".

Nothing.

But sometimes, it's fun to wonder.

Bear Witness to The Awesome

2006-05-13T20:00:00.000-04:00

If you have a gander over on the right hand side of your screen, there is a list of blogs which I read on a regular basis. One of those I enjoy is that of Jessica Stover. Why, you might ask?

Bear witness.

That Night in Toronto

2006-05-10T09:45:00.000-04:00

Growing up in Sudbury, Ontario (and the outskirts thereof), I always considered myself something of a "small town" guy. There was something attractive in not having to contend with congested traffic on a daily basis, having a big yard with trees, knowing your neighbours by name, and other things attributed to small town living. This was further reinforced when I moved out to Saskatchewan and lived in Carlyle for 3 years, a place with a whopping population of 1200. Sure, I missed some of the conveniences of an urban centre (theatres, restaurants, etc), but regardless of that, I was fairly content.

When someone out there would ask me how I liked it, since I came from Ontario (a word which was often spoken with thinly veiled disdain by the locals, since it was a strange and alien place filled with them "city folks"), I would tell them that it wasn't that big a deal, since I was a "small town" guy from Northern Ontario, which was completely different. I would even often add that I wasn't a big fan of Southern Ontario......and Toronto in particular.

All this is slightly ironic since now I live just north of Toronto, and a great deal of my work time is spent within the very "center of the Universe" that I used to put down at every opportunity. And contrary to my previous opinions about the place (which were formulated primarily by a Grade 8 field trip and a couple bus excursions as a teen to see a play and a Jays game), I've come to rather enjoy the place. Not necessarily the nerve-fraying traffic or industrial eyesores that populate the Greater Toronto Area landscape, but the downtown core in particular.

Last night, I was downtown for work. It was about 4pm and some co-workers and I had sat down for a quick bite on a patio at the corner of Front and York. The sun was shining, the weather was warm with a cool breeze. Traffic and pedestrians buzzed through the intersection on their way home from work, many dressed smartly in business attire. The area was full of twenty-somethings, many who were likely students. Blue Jays jerseys and Pearl Jam t-shirts caused those in the crowd to pop out at me, reminding me of just two of the events going on downtown that evening (one of which I had full intentions of attending as of a couple of months ago, but for which plans did not materialize). I began to wonder what it would have been like to go to school or live in downtown Toronto. How would I have enjoyed living in a condo or apartment, taking the subway or walking where I needed to go? To be in such close proximity to so much culture, entertainment and activity might have been an interesing experience. Would I be happy with such an urban fantasy, or is my "small town" reality more in keeping with my personality. I suppose we always wonder if things are better on the other side.

In consolation, I am close enough now that I can experience a lot of the aspects of big city living anyway, and my job takes me down there pretty frequently. Perhaps it's a happy medium.

In summary, I guess what I'm trying to say is, I need to see more concerts. Therefore, extended family should try and win more tickets on the radio since apparently they have Cliff Claven type knowledge of obscure musical trivia.

And because I'm cheap. (the real reason I can't live in Toronto)

;)

ring a bell and I'll salivate

2006-04-28T08:36:00.000-04:00

I've been involved in a discussion thread in the comments section of an entry on Wil Wheaton's (Stand By Me, Star Trek: TNG) website. The subject, loosely stated, is about violence in video games. If you're interested at all, you can check it out here.

The Calm Before The Swelter

2006-04-27T20:06:00.000-04:00

there’s spring in the air
they’re sweeping the streets
wind is a breeze
the sun becomes her he agrees

what’s holding up her face?
nothing but blue skies

-Metric: Love Is A Place-

I love spring.

We've had a pretty good one so far. Sun, cool weather, not too much rain. Perfect. I've been working quite a bit the last couple of weeks, so haven't had too much time to enjoy it. A couple weeks ago we took the pup down to the beach. He had a good time. Can you tell?

Photos from the Field

2006-04-27T19:20:00.000-04:00

See...I don't just sit around the office.

Sometimes I stand around the tarmac.

No Time in the Present

2006-04-26T21:19:00.000-04:00

Someone is stealing time. My time. I'm not sure who, and I'm not sure why. But I have my suspicions.

[shoulder check]

Ninjas.

They're crafty.

With the mysterious loss of time, I'm left with a pile of tasks I want to accomplish that just aren't getting done. Housework. Reading. Blogging. Heck.....I barely have time to watch t.v. these days. And don't even get me started on the stack of PS2 games sitting idle on my dining room table....

I suppose it doesn't help when you unexpectedly have to go away for 4 days due to work, 2 of which were days off. The only redeeming factor is the overtime. Ye$$$$$$$$!

I'm going to try and make an effort to post more in the next little while. Contemplating a bit of a blog redesign too. I guess it depends on whether I can outsmart the ninjas.

You WISH your life was this exciting...

2006-04-18T21:42:00.000-04:00

Forgive me Readers, for I have sinned. It has been a week since my last entry.

In lieu of a long, topic-specific post, here's a few random tidbits of what's been going on.

- Went to Sudbury for Easter Weekend. It was a good, but quick visit. We did our best to get around and see everyone. We got to meet 'Gerry' and delivered 'Merlin' to my mother-in-law. Rudy was a bit of a suck for the duration of the visit. Not quite sure what his deal was, but I think he may have been homesick.

- I had missed the 2006 Junos the first time around, but managed to play catch up thanks to Dad's DVR. A few observations:

1. Coldplay and Black Eyed Peas performing on the Junos? Coldplay and Black Eyed Peas TYING for Best International Artist? Lame. L-A-M-E. Lame.

2. Rex Goudie getting more nominations than Arcade Fire. Whaaaaaat?

3. Buck 65. Who is this guy, and why did they put him on t.v.?

4. Pamela Anderson. I want to comment, but I'm really just at a loss for words.

5. What is the deal with Kalan Porter, a.k.a. Skeletor? Who is that boy's image consultant? He looks skinnier (and scarier) than Kate Moss....and she's an anorexic supermodel with a $1000 a day crack habit.

- Tam and I got crackin' on some yardwork when we got back from Sudbury. We went to Home Depot and picked up some soil to fill in the crater in our backyard, and did some lawn repair and seeding. The weather has been so nice, it's been hard to stay in the house.

- We did stay in the house long enough to clean up our office/computer room. It's kind of nice to be able to see the desk again. And floor.

- It's 10pm, and I get to wake up at 5am and go back to work tomorrow. Yay. With that said......bloggo el finito.

How do you like them apples?

2006-04-11T21:36:00.000-04:00

"See, the sad thing about a guy like you is, in 50 years you're gonna start doin' some thinkin' on your own and you're going to come up with the fact that there are two certainties in life: one, don't do that, and two, you dropped 150 grand on a f***in' education you could have got for a dollar fifty in late charges at the public library!"

- Good Will Hunting -

When I was in school, I hated it.

Not all of it. Not every class. Not every teacher. There was the odd moment of enjoyment and appreciation for what I was learning. But for the most part, it was a drag. I consider myself relatively intelligent, and was able to muddle through with very little effort on my part. I was never in any danger of being named valedictorian, but I graduated.

I think when you're a teenager, it's hard to appreciate how what you're learning will affect your life in any meaningful way. And being told what you have to learn....well, being told that you have to do anything is just begging for an initial rebellious instinct, isn't it? And I think some people are just better at school than others, be it because of a better memory, enjoying the structure, or for whatever reason. For me, I was just happy to be done with it and into the workforce, because I always seemed to be more successful with work than school, it had tangible rewards (i.e. money), and what you did had external results outside of yourself.

So I've been in the workforce for the last 7 years or so, since my graduation, and happy as a hippie in a hemp store. Work has provided a number of challenges and things to learn to perfect my craft. And I have much yet to learn, I'm sure, but it's more task specific, as the foundations are now in place. In my current position, I also have a bit more downtime on my hands, as the nature of the work is that when it's busy, it's really busy, but when it's not.....it's agonizingly slow. My current work is also not very mentally taxing. It's important, it requires alertness and attention to detail....but doesn't require a great deal of mental acuity. As a result, my brain has been a bit......hungry, of late. I've considered taking courses by correspondence and nightclasses, but I don't know if that's right for me. I've always liked the above quoted line from Good Will Hunting, and it struck a chord with me, so I've taken to reading a bit more of late. Non-fiction, at that.

I just finished reading On Killing by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman. It was a fascinating read in which he talks about the psychological costs on the individual who is required to kill, and the conditioning factors that can make him more prepared to do so. For anyone who has an academic interest in violence and combat, it's a must read. I had bought that book at Chapters, and read it in a couple of weeks. I'd compiled a "wish list" at indigo.ca of other books I'm interested in reading (feel free to check them out), but was a bit depressed at the cost.

Anyway, I went to the library today, and low and behold, they have a couple of the books on the shelf. So for a library card that cost me $0, I picked up Bitter Embrace by Maggie Siggins, which is actually about the reserve of Pelican Narrows where I was posted and lived from the summers of 2003 to 2005. I have a feeling it's a bit of a biased view, but I'm interested to see what's written.

It's hard to find the time to read. There's always work, t.v. to watch, Internet to surf, errands to run, sleep, KIDS (looking forward to that one), etc, etc. It's almost like you have to make an appointment with yourself. So why take the time? Why read? What good is it?

Truth be told, I don't know.

But I'm hoping to find out.

it's the end of the world as we know it

2006-04-07T14:33:00.000-04:00

So I read they're planning on doing a biopic on the life of Mother Theresa. When they suggested who they're looking at to play the role of the saintly nun I thought, of course, that makes perfect sense. She'll be able to draw on her vast personal and acting experience which is undoubtedly relevant to the role. Perfect!

What do you think?

and the sky was angel dust

2006-04-03T15:44:00.000-04:00

"Our lives in these empty spaces aside
I'm tired of walking around with my hand on my gun
I'm tired of watching them wind you up to see if you'll run
Tonight I'm going to go out and have me some fun
I'm tired of walking around here with my hand on my gun"

-Sort of a Protest Song-

The culmination of 10+ years of fanatical fandom came to a head this past weekend when I finally saw Matthew Good live at Call the Office in London, Ontario.

In a nutshell.....the show was ~~awesome~~ HAWESOME!

The venue was small, and the layout wasn't the best, but the six of us (myself, Tam, Kim, Steve, Terry and Terry's boyfriend) were able to get in relatively early and snag a few stools and table (of sorts). Steve and I decided to split a few pitchers of Canadian. I'm still belching the effects of that decision.

The opening act was Melissa McLelland, a singer/songwriter from the Toronto area. She had a great voice and some good songs. About half the club was chatting and barely paying attention as she performed. I picked up her CD after the show.

When Matt finally took the stage and started into Avalanche, I was blown away. Some artists sound really good recorded and are terrible live, and vice versa. Such was not the case with Matt. As he continued into his set, I just lost myself in the music, singing along. It was a great experience, because I've never met anyone who
was as big a Matthew Good fan as I am. You begin to think that maybe you're the only one, and no one else really "gets it" like you do. But all of a sudden I was transported into a place where I was surrounded by fans, many singing along, and it just felt right. I think this sort of communal experience is what makes live shows so great. Especially a smaller venue, acoustic show like this was, which I feel is directed at fans, and not just those who like the radio hits.

I was really happy as Matt played some of my favourites like Advertising on Police Cars, Generation X-Wing and Fated. There were also a couple of new songs, like When Hollywood Runs Out of Indians, Breath Of A Nation, Hopeless, She's In It For The Money, and Can't Get Shot In The Back If You Don't Run.

Oh yeah, and a duet of Hurt (NIN, Johnny Cash) with Melissa McLelland. One of my favourtie songs of all-time sung by my favourite artist. How cool is that?

Additionally, there was some good interaction with the crowd, such as when he displayed his Ann Coulter doll and presented some members of the audience with pages he ripped out of Paris Hilton's book. Surprisingly, there wasn't as much political commentary as I was expecting. But I guess that's what his blog is for. That night was for the music.

At the end of the day, it was a fantastic show, and well worth the price of admission at $25. I'd have paid 10 times that. I'll definitely be seeing him again next time I get the opportunity.

a free ride when you've already paid

2006-03-31T22:09:00.000-05:00

So there I was....naked as the day I was born....taking a shower in the men's locker room after a session in the gym at work. I gaze up and am struck by an image which conjures thoughts of irony....

Why is there a sprinkler system in the shower?

Hmmm.

The Return of Dark Helmet

2006-03-30T22:12:00.000-05:00

A little bit of good news for me today on the work front. Two pieces, in fact. The first is that I've finally been given a date to attend the National VIP Course in Ottawa this June. Once I have that under my belt, I'll start to get duties that are a little more interesting, as opposed to driving the spare vehicle, or watching elevators.

Secondly, after some political wrangling and creative email writing, I've finally got the green light to join the Ontario RCMP Public Order Troop. As some of you may know, I served on the team in Saskatchewan for about 3-4 years, and enjoyed it immensely. My only deployment was to the G8 Summit in Kananaskis, AB, but as things remained peaceful, we weren't called to duty. First practice with the new team is at the end of April.

Colour me happy.

It's Everywhere You Don't Want To Be

2006-03-25T10:43:00.000-05:00

Two tickets to The Inside Man: $19.00
Large pop and Resse's Pieces: $8.00
Gas for return trip to theatre: $5.00

Staying at home with a rental: Priceless.

Yep....last night was date night. Tam and I went out to the show for the first time in a long time. It reminded me about why people are buying big screen televisions and staying away.
I really wanted to see V for Vendetta, but The Inside Man was my second choice. So putting the decision in the pregnant lady's hands, that's the show we ended up going to see. We got there about 1/2 hour before the show, and there were lineups for the ticket counter and the automated ticket terminals. Having no cash, I got into one of the terminal lineups. Let me just say, that if in this day and age you don't know how to use an ATM, please don't leave your house. Stay inside and stop messing with the lives of the rest of us. I don't feel like standing behind you while you scratch your head and wonder, "Now how does this work again?"

After an agonizing wait, I finally was able to purchase the tickets. Enter the concession line.

Dave's Law #8: No matter what line you pick, that line will be the slowest.

We get behind some dude buying popcorn and drinks for a family of 30. After stepping to the side so the forklift could get in, we were able to make our order. A large Diet Pepsi, and a box of Reese's Pieces. $8.14!! That's an hours wage for some people. Controversial!

There were no Tribute magazines available, which is one of the things I look forward to when I go to the show.
So it was a direct walk to Cinema 12. Do not pass Go. Do not pick up your magazine.

Oh. My. God.

I don't remember the last time I went to a movie that was so packed. There were no seats for 2 available in all the upper section (which is where I always sit) and the lower section was filling fast. We grabbed a couple chairs on the far left. So for the duration of the film, we would have to have our heads "back and to the left". Gazing up....straining to focus...I was pretty stoked. We left the two aisle seats beside us vacant, which were soon occupied. Some "princess" in the row behind didn't even bother to take her foot off the seat when someone sat in it. The youth of today are so considerate.

There were a couple good previews like The Sentinel (Michael Douglas, Keifer Sutherland, Eva Longoria, Kim Basinger), The Break Up (Jennifer Aniston, Vince Vaughn), The Da Vinci Code (Tom Hanks) and MI: 3 (Tom Craz....er Cruise). Then the movie started. About 5 minutes into the show my bladder called. It was urgent. I hung up. He kept calling, over and over and over again, which made it hard to enjoy the movie, but I managed to ignore it as best I could.

As for the movie itself, I was a bit dissappointed. It's not uncommon these days. I don't think the movies aren't as good, I think I'm just pickier as to what I like. The plot was okay, but there wasn't much character development, so it was hard to really care. It was all about the bank robbery and trying to figure out what's really going on. I'd give it about a 6 out of a possible 10.

Final verdict: We probably should have stayed home with a rental and watched it on the 40" LCD. Next time.

Honeymoon in Scotland: Day 8 to 14

2006-03-21T20:09:00.000-05:00

Okay. So I've been putting this off. But tonight I find myself motivated to finish the tale, for these three reasons (in no particular order):

1. To get Steve to stop bugging me.
2. To help Laura plan her trip to Scotland.
3. To give myself an excuse not to watch American Idol.

Given that I've waited so long to complete the last installment, the details in my brain are a bit fuzzy. Luckily for me, though, I kept a journal. Hah! Screw you, memory!

Shall we begin?

Our fearsome foursome woke up early to catch the 630 am shuttle from the hostel to the downtown core. The revellers whose revelling we were forced to endure all evening were still in the hostel bar. I shook my head in disgust. Then I felt old. While shuttling our way through Edinburgh, we started chatting with a fellow passenger. His name was Yoed. He was from Israel. Oddly enough, he was heading to the same tour we were, so this was the beginning of our 6 day adventure together. Hopping off downtown, we trekked across the North Bridge to the Royal Mile and decided to sample some local coffee. At Starbucks. Where we spent half our remaining funds for a hot chocolate and a muffin. But, it made the Bear's happy, so whatever.

When I was done recalculating our budget, we headed down the road to the Haggis Tour office. It had started to rain. This became a theme during our tour. But....it was Scotland...in October....so the griping was held to a minimum. We had actually been pretty fortunate up until then. We signed in, shuffled around outside and found our bus. We met our bus driver/tour guide, Laura, who proceeded to load the trunk with 20-some-odd backpacks (each the relative size and weight of a sixth grader) and attempt to shut it without being buried alive. With the help of some burly Canadians, the trunk was closed without any fatalities. Shortly thereafter, our merry band of Canadians, Australians, Asians, 2 Americans, an Israeli, a New Zealander, and a South African set off.

Our 6 day tour began with an introduction to our tour guide, the self-proclaimed "Lucious Laura", a freckled blonde from Inverness with a great sense of humour, a passion for all things Scottish, and conspiratorial glance and smile she would flash through the big bus mirror as she drove. We got some interesting facts, including an elaborate tale about how the Scottish invented the term "sh!tfaced", as well as the rules on Laura's Flaming Bus of Burning Love. We also learned about her love for all things Bon Jovi, and she played her personal theme song, Laura by the Scissor Sisters.

Leaving Edinburgh, we first made our way to Stirling where we visited the Wallace Monument. It was a difficult foot trek to the top. Tam turned back halfway up as her blisters were bothering her. There was a significant fee to enter the actual monument, so we just stayed outside and took in the view of Stirling, and listened as Laura passed on the tale of the Battle of Stirling Bridge (made famous in Braveheart). Leaving there, we travelled through the Trossachs (Rob Roy country) and Glen Coe. In Glen Coe we were told the tragic story of the massacre of the Macdonald's at the hand of the Campbells (who don't appear to be a popular
clan in the annals of Scottish history...). At one of the pit stops, we also were afforded the delight of seeing Hamish, the Highland Cow (or "Heilan Coo"). We stopped in Oban for the night, and checked into the hostel. We went for dinner at a little pub called Mackie Dan's. Sometime during our stay, it started to rain. Hard. Really hard. Tam and I sprinted back to the hostel with another Canuck couple, David and Arryn. We got hosed. It was like Beer Hunter. "Towel off!" On an interesting sidenote, David is the nephew of Jim Gordon, who was mayor of Sudbury. Small world. I said goodnight to Tam and headed to my 6-man dorm. Sleep was elusive. The bunk bed didn't help.

In the morning we departed for Fort William. We stopped at the Glenfinnan Viaduct where a part of the Harry Potter movie was filmed. At lunch we marvelled at the mists, behind which we're told was Ben Nevis, the highest mountain in Scotland. Pressing up the coast, we made a few more stops at "points of interest" and did a little whiskey tasting as well. Along the way, Laura commented that the weather had turned from "atmospheric" to "dramatic". She wasn't lying. We crossed the bridge to the Isle of Skye and proceeded to our second stop for a two night stay. Our foursome
decided to depart from the hostel experience, which we'd had enough of after that last 3 nights (plus the lousy McLay's from the night before that), and opted for a bed and breakfast. Both couples booked in for both nights, and it was a welcome change. We booked in, then met the group back at the hostel bar for a meal and some live music (blues/jazz). Arryn had some fresh prawns. Wow. I think I'll pass.

The next day was for touring Skye. True to theme, it was raining. We set off up the east coast of the island. The scenery was spectacular. Laura had a wealth of knowledge of local history and legend (as well as a few personal anecdotes, which she was always generous to share) from time spent on the Isle in her youth. We heard the legend of Duncan and Morag, the tale of the Faerie Flag of Clan Macleod, and the history of the brutal Macleod/Macdonald feud. When we stopped for lunch, most of us opted to try some traditional Scottish fare. Haggis!
Some enjoyed it, while others didn't care for it at all. I thought it was alright, though I don't know that I'd add it to my weekly menu. I'd have it again, though. After that, we visited the grave of Flora Macdonald, the woman who helped Bonnie Prince Charlie escape the government forces during the Jacobite Uprising. We also visited a ruined castle of the Macleod Clan, which was apparently haunted. We suffered through the rain for another day and finished back at the hostel bar for another meal. We also sat down and got to know some of the Australian contingent a bit better.

Thankfully, the following day the weather started to clear. We headed back to the mainland and up the coast to Ullapool for lunch. We also had to do some groceries as the hostel that night was self service. The highlight of the day was the stop at the Bone Caves. If there was much history attached to them, I missed it, but the views were spectacular. We hiked up into the highlands where there were some caves nestled high on the mountainside. There were some inner caves that many crawled into (under Laura's guidance) for a little spelunking. It was a little claustrophobic for my taste, so I
stayed out and enjoyed the view. From there, it was onward to our hostel, Carbisdale Castle, which is the flagship of the Youth Hostel Association and is said to be haunted. After preparing our own dinner, the group headed down a road, over a fence, through a field, along a path, over a bridge and across a street to the Invershin bar. A number of the tour were provided with some kilts and other traditional dress for an evening of drinking and live music. A family group consisting of a bagpiper and father and son who played the Baran (bone drum) entertained us with some traditional Scottish music. All the Haggis bus driver's also have their own drink at the bar, so I tried Lucious Laura's Lethal Liqour which was a mix of Irn Bru and 7 shots of liqour (at least 2 of which were tequila). After a few beer and that, I was pretty good for the rest of the evening. One of the American's got really drunk, and disappeared, heading back to the hostel on his own. We were concerned, as it was a difficult walk from someone who was sober. So we kept an eye out for him on our walk back in the dark, across the street, over the bridge, along the path, through the field, over the fence and up the road. We almost got lost ourselves, until one of the folks on the tour showed up with a flashlight. Ultimately, we found the Yank passed out in his bunk, so all was well.

I woke up with a bit of a headache (thanks Laura). We drove back south, stopping for a nature hike by a waterfall, as well as at the Glen Ord distillery. Inverness was the next destination, where we stayed for lunch. Tam and I had some traditional Pizza Hut at the mall. We hit the Battlefield of Culloden Moor, where in 1746 Bonnie Prince Charlie and the Jacobites were defeated by the Government forces. It was cold. And raining. Nearby, we stopped at one of Laura's favourite spots, which she only takes "special" tour groups to. (I bet she says that to all the tours....) It was a site of a number of stone cairns which are said to be about 5000 years old. Pretty cool. It's said that they are arranged in the patter of Orion's Belt, which has also been said of the Pyramids. We continued south along the western bank of Loch Ness, stopping for a few photo ops. We pitted in at St. Augustus for the night, at the southern tip of Loch Ness. We stayed at Morag's Hostel, in which the dorms had movie themes. We were in the Trainspotting dorm. After supper and a few hands of cards, I called it a night on account of my headache.

On the last day of the tour, we headed to the southern tip of Loch Ness to do some "Nessie" calling, led by Laura, which consisted of a chant and various body gyrations that at a distance may resemble the Macarena. We made a couple stops on this last day, but nothing that really stands out. We stopped at one town and took a group photo (of which I've never received a copy) and presented Laura with an autographed rain poncho. Then it was onward to Edinburgh, over the Forth Bridge, and back to the Haggis tour office. Tour complete.

We decided to stay at a Travelodge in downtown Edinburgh rather than deal with another hostel. It was rather expensive for a relatively crummy room, but we didn't have to walk far, and the bed wasn't bad. Tam and I went for supper, then we met up with the Bear's and some others from the tour and went to the Walkabout pub, an Australian bar. We had a good time, then said our goodbyes and headed back to our room.

We met the Bear's in the morning and went for lunch, after which we parted ways (they were staying on for a few days in Scotland, then to Belgium. We did some souvenir shopping up and down the Royal Mile. I found it hard to find anything good, as everything was very corny and tourist oriented. And every shop had the same stuff. Once finished, we hopped a train back to Glasgow, then a bus to the airport. We stayed at the Ramada at the airport and ate at the hotel restaurant. It wasn't cheap, but it was nice. Unfortunately, we didn't get much time to enjoy it, as we had an early flight.

The flight was bumpy. A lady in the next row was crying. I was even white-knuckled on a few occassions. It cleared up eventually though. The in-flight movies were Batman Begins and Mr. and Mrs. Smith, so that was alright. We also got a nice view of the snow-capped mountains of Greenland as we passed over the southern tip. The rest of the flight was uneventful.

We arrived in Toronto after about a 7 hour flight. We drove 1 hour home. Packed again. Drove 3.5 hours to Sudbury and attended my friend's wedding reception.

And then we slept.

Killingtime in the Void

2006-03-13T19:34:00.000-05:00

Hello (Hello)....is there anybody out there...?

Let me start by just taking a quick poll. If you're reading this post and you are NOT related to me, be it by blood or marriage, please leave a comment. It doesn't have to be Shakespeare. I'm just curious to see if anyone is reading this stupid thing.

Now for some random thoughts:

- I get to leave for Sudbury in 2 hours. It's foggy. It's rainy. It's a 3 1/2 trek.
- My dog is depressed. He didn't get his walk today.
- Prime Minister Harper is in Afghanistan. Good for him.
- I just burned a CD with over 130 songs for my forthcoming car ride.
- I just had a frozen pizza for supper. I must be a masochist.
- I'm thirsty.
- I need music.
- That's better. Matt Good. I'm going to see him, donchaknow?
- Set up my webcam today. Spoke to my Dad and Daryn with it. Why did I wait so long?
- Should blogging be a chore?
- Have I ever written anything of consequence?
- Where is my contractor?
- Battlestar Galactica is a hawesome show. Watch it.....or die!
- Okay....so you won't die....but you're missing out.
- I hope Matt Good is good live. After 10 years, I don't want to be dissappointed.
- Why don't I start writing the novel/screenplay I keep telling myself I'm going to write?
- Have you seen the Muffin Man?
- The Muffin Man?
- The Muffin Man.
- Why doesn't anyone I ever talk to like The Thin Red Line? It's one of my favourite movies.
- I'm already tired. Why did I have to get up at 730am. It's going to be a long drive.
- My driving partner from work keeps trying to "save" me. He says anyone who isn't Born Again is going to Hell.
- I wonder what's happening in Pelican Narrows right now.
- I can't believe it's not butter.
- Is there anything else?
- Nope.

2006-03-10T19:57:00.000-05:00

Got a question?

Ask a Ninja.

Heh.

2006-03-10T19:09:00.000-05:00

Funny. Really funny.

Uhh...what's the '+' sign mean...??

2006-03-06T13:42:00.000-05:00

Stewie (talking on Sesame Street phone): Put me through to the Pentagon!

Ernie: Do you know what sound a cow makes?

Stewie: Don't toy with me Ernie! I've already dispacted Mr. Hooper, I've got 6 armed men stationed out side Big Bird's nest, and well as for Linda, well, its rather difficult for a deaf woman to hear an assasin approach now, isn't it?!

Ernie: Can you count to three?

Stewie: Oh indeed I can! (Pulls out a raygun.) One! Two! Three! Can I count to three for God's sake?! I'm already shooting at a fifth grade level!

Yeah.....so for those of you who haven't heard....apparently I'm going to be a Dad.

*faint*

*thud*

One Year

2006-03-03T13:18:00.000-05:00

In Memory

Geek Alert!

2006-02-25T13:01:00.000-05:00

<geek>

You'll have to indulge me a moment while I tap into my inner geek.

It's not a well-guarded secret that I used to read the occassional comic book in my youth. In truth, if I could justify the expense, I'd probably still collect them. Thankfully, though, with the technological advances of modern cinema, a lot of comics are getting the silver screen treatment. The last installment of Batman (Batman Begins) was exceptionally done, and a sequel is in the works (which hopefully doesn't turn out like Batman Returns, the sequel to Tim Burton's Batman). Of slightly less interest to me is the upcoming Superman flick, though to it's credit it has Bryan Singer at the helm, who directed the first X-Men film, which was great. Lost yet? Anyway, I have never been a big fan of Superman, as I've always found him to be too powerful. It gets boring when every villain has kryptonite. Yawn. We'll see how it turns out.

Far more exciting, however, is the anticipated third installments of Spiderman 3 and X-Men 3. The Spiderman franchise has been exceptionally done, and since it looks like Venom will be making an appearance, I'm especially eager. We'll see how X-Men 3 turns out without Bryan Singer at the helm, but the trailers have looked promising thus far.

I can't wait.

</geek>

Blog-o-rama

2006-02-24T20:40:00.000-05:00

So apparently I am one of them.

Of course, in my lack of posting, no one was bound, tethered, handcuffed, lashed or gagged. I guess I've just been busy with work and such, as well as dealing with my contractor, among other things. So, for those of you that are just DYING to hear from me.....this one's for you.

Tam and I went out for dinner tonight in a post-Valentine's day date, since our schedules have been diametrically opposed of late. The Keg was the beneficiary of our patronage, and I had a fantastic steak and shrimp dinner. It makes the price tag a little easier to swallow.

The contractor has been plugging away at the basement. First coat of paint is up in the rec room. Still need to install the floor and do the finishing touches. Hopefully by Monday or Tuesday it will be DONE.

I just learned that Matthew Good is going to be making a stop on his upcoming acoustic tour in London, ON at Call the Office. For those who don't know, Matt Good is my favouritest (yes, I know that's not a word) musician in the whole wide world, and has been since university. In all that time (about 10 years), I haven't been able to see him live (which may partly be attributed to being dumped in Saskatchewan for 5 of those years). I must obtain tickets to see him in London, or one of the other dates. Otherwise....heads will roll.

Speaking of heads, mine is longing for a pillow, so that's all you get.

Stay tuned.

P.S. Dad, I thought I told you not to perform handstands on the housewares. Ease up on the homebrew. :)

Woof!

2006-01-31T08:07:00.000-05:00

About a year or two ago, I received an email at work. It was an excerpt from a book by Dave Grossman, a retired Lt. Col, I believe, from the US Military. He has written extensively on the psychology of combat and killing and how it relates to soldiers and law enforcement. The email described three types of people, categorized as "sheep", "wolves" and "sheepdogs". I wanted to read it again, but no longer having the email, I had to turn to the Web. I found the passage quoted within another article, which can be read here. I thought it was a good read....so if you're interested, follow the link.

Seven Days Later

2006-01-30T14:15:00.000-05:00

Ironically, about 1 hour after my last entry, I got a phone call. From work. They wanted me to work that night on the NDP. All night long and then into my dayshift the next day. I had no desire to work....but it's hard to turn down that overtime, y'know? So I said yes, and went to try and get some sleep. About an hour into my peaceful slumber, I was roused to take another call. Turns out they don't need me to come in. I was mildly relieved, but somewhat frustrated in that I wasn't going to make any extra coin, and that I'd wasted some of my day "preparing" for work. Ah well. So...I stayed up to watch Harper and the Conservatives win a minority government, and then went to bed.

Work was....well....there. No VIP's coming in, so things were pretty quiet in the office. I was fighting a killer cold that reared it's head on Sunday morning in Windsor. But I made it through.

Wednesday morning, I felt worse. I called in sick. Caught up on some sleep. In the evening, we decided to bite the bullet and go get our new t.v. to replace the one that died. Again. So now I have my dream t.v. A Sony Bravia 40" LCD/HD flat panel. (insert Homer-esque drool). Woohoo!

Back to work on Thursday and Friday. Ever see Office Space? You know when the Bob's ask Peter to go through his average day of work. Yeah.

I was asked Friday to work a midnight on Friday night/Saturday morning, so I got to go home early to get some sleep. Thanks to phone calls, roaring snowmobiles, and other distractions, that worked out to be about 1 hour of sleep. Turned out to be a long night.

The rest of the weekend was pretty tame. The biggest news is that I got a haircut, so pretty darn exciting.

And now it's Monday....a week since my last post. It's surprising that I'm even writing this now, since it seems that a lot of people thought the world was going to end when the Conservatives won on Monday night. But......we're still here. The sky hasn't fallen yet. I guess Harper's dragon is still in the closet.

Maybe he'll destroy the country next week. Someone call Michael Moore. He'll know what to do.

It's Over!

2006-01-23T13:39:00.000-05:00

The election is over!

At least, as far as I'm concerned. The actual results don't roll in until tonight, but I voted at an advance poll, and I don't have to travel around with the party leaders anymore.

I just got back from a long stretch with the Conservatives last night. Last weekend I had gotten a call from work telling me we'd be working 4 days, with 1 overnight for certain. In London.

It ended up being 6 days. 5 overnights. No London.

Such is the nature of the political beast. We plan and plan and make sure everything is in place.....and then you're told things are changing and your plans are by and large out the window.

So....I'm going to try and enjoy my 1 day off....watch some election coverage (you'd think I'd have gotten enough), and head to the office tomorrow to put in my meal/hotel/overtime claims.

Woohoo.

On the road again....

2006-01-16T00:13:00.000-05:00

Summary: My Last 4 Days

Innisfil - Newmarket - Toronto - Oakville - Innisfil - Oakville - Barrie - Huntsville - North Bay - Pembroke - North Bay - Newmarket - Innisfil.

I have tomorrow off....then it looks like I may be on the road again from Tuesday to Saturday. Fun fun fun.

So basically....probably no posts of substance for a little while.

2006-01-08T23:38:00.000-05:00

Hmm. It's been a while, hasn't it? I bet you all have been anxiously awaiting a new entry, checking my site religiously. Hoping. Waiting.

Or maybe not. But if you were....get over it. I've been busy. Living out of a suitcase isn't all it's cracked up to be. Been on the road with the NDP and Liberals this past week, as Federal Election 2006 continues. Later this week, the Conservatives will be fortunate enough to have me.

So Tam and I went out to dinner tonight. Applebee's, courtesy of a gift certificate for my birthday (thanks Uncle Gary!). The meal was alright...but my steak was a bit undercooked. As usual. Twice while we were there, the waitresses came out clapping in a procession to sing Happy Birthday to someone in the restaurant. You see this at a lot of places now. Who's brainchild was that? I'm going to wager that it wasn't one of the poor schmucks who has to got out and sing it 8 times a shift, and pretend like it's their favourite thing to do in the world. And who really enjoys having that done, anyway? Just give them their free slice of cake and be done with it already. (Granted, it can be kind of fun when you're out to dinner with a group of Mounties and you tell the servers that it's the birthday of one of the guys at your table when it really isn't and then watch him turn red and uncomfortable as the eyes of the whole restaurant turn on him as he is serenaded by a course of "The Old Gray Mare..." and made to wear the fuzzy viking hat........hypothetically speaking, of course).

And in conclusion.....THE END.

Whatcha Talkin' About, Apu?

2005-12-31T11:50:00.000-05:00

Last night I was sitting in my living room, playing a little God of War on the PS2 when the phone rang.

*sigh*

[pauses PS2]

[answers phone]

Me: Hello?

Roger's Rep: [thick East Indian accent] Hello sir, I am calling for Roger's Wireless. You are a customer with us, sir?

Me: Yes I am.

RR: [much background noise consisting of other accented individuals speaking on the phone) Yes sir, we are calling to make a special offer to our special customers like yourself and offering them a free phone. It is the X296-blah-blah-camera phone-blah-blah and it is free of charge to you our special customer.

Me: [straining to hear through the accent and background noise] What?

RR: The phone...blah blah...special customer...blah blah....free....blah blah

Me: [confused] Does it work off the same plan? I don't want a second plan.

RR: Blah blah.....[incomprehensible]...blah blah....

Me: I'm not interested.

RR: [sounding shocked and surprised] Why not, sir?

Me: [thinking - "Because I can't understand a freakin' word that you're saying"] I'm just not.

RR: [pause]

Me: Is that all?

RR: Do you subscribe to Roger's high speed internet, sir...?

Me: No, I don.....

RR: Because we have a special offer for our special customers....

Me: NOT.....INTERESTED.

RR: [taken aback] Okay sir. Thank you.

[click]

Not the first time I've had a conversation like that. It gets me mad on so many levels. Number one....nothing is free. Don't sell me that line. You're a business...if there isn't something in it for you, there's definitely nothing in it for me. I hate when they act like they're a freakin' charity giving stuff away. And B), where's the professionalism? This guy's accent was so thick, I'd have trouble understanding him if we were in the same room together. On the phone, with a cacaphony of background noise (in the call centre where this guy works), I could barely make out what he was saying.

I'm thinking of investing in one of those airhorns you can buy at Canadian Tire:

RR: Sir, I'd like to tell you about a special off.....

Me: SQWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!

[click]

Sweet.

[unpause PS2]

Weird.

2005-12-30T20:20:00.000-05:00

I have my Windows Media Player on shuffle. Face Pollution by Soundgarden just transitioned to No One Is To Blame by Howard Jones. How does that happen?

In my defense.....I grew up in the 80's.

sniff I DO Smell Something....

2005-12-23T20:58:00.000-05:00

I don't understand dogs.

For some reason that escapes my capacity for comprehension, my dog (or perhaps all dogs in general), has some instinct coded in his genetics that predisposes him to roll in the feces of other dogs. Normally in the winter, I don't need to concern myself with this, as the turds left behind by inconsiderate dog owners are frozen and often buried. Today, however, was significantly mild, with rain, and all kinds of treasures were uncovered in the park which I routinely let my dog run free in. I had only turned my back for a minute, but somehow the stupid mutt managed to indulge himself in a crap bath.

Good times.

Do You Smell Something?

2005-12-23T07:16:00.000-05:00

"Age is of no importance unless you are a cheese."
-Anonymous-

Soooo....yesterday was my birthday. The big three-oh. I'm trying to remember where my youth went. When I was in high school I would think far ahead to the year 2000....a new millenium....and how I would be 25. An old man. It makes me wonder how I look to someone in high school now.

Depressing.

Can You Feel The Glow Of Commerce?

2005-12-17T22:56:00.000-05:00

I went Christmas shopping today.

Nothing quite gets me into the holiday spirit like pushing through crowds of irrate consumers, getting honked at by some idiot who wanted the parking spot that I CLEARLY was waiting for first, and dumping cash on gifts that the intended receiver may not even like.

Ho Ho Ho.

2005-12-16T23:16:00.000-05:00

Know what irks me? The apple display at the supermarket. Ever notice how they always stack the apples with the imperfections facing down. You go to grab one thinking it looks good, then turn it over and see it has a bruise the size of Mikhail Gorbachev's birthmark on it. So I end up going through all the freakin' apples in search of the good ones, and in the process upset the delicate balance of the apple pyramid, causing a landslide.

One of these days the stock boy is going to catch a Golden Delicious right in the freakin' temple.

Honeymoon in Scotland: Day 5 to 7

2005-12-15T21:30:00.000-05:00

We woke up in Balloch.

I won't say it was morning, as it was still dark, and we had to skip the second "B" in B&B as our host wasn't awake yet. On the plus side, traffic was light for our drive into Glasgow and back to the airport. We had to take a toll bridge over the river on the way. (Side note: Tam hates bridges, and Scotland has it's fair share of them, which was a constant source of amusement for me) We returned the rental (goodbye Peugeot 307) which I had finally started driving well. I should probably mention that our trip to Scotland wasn't 4 days long. We were meeting our friends Kelvin and Marie-Eve Bear who were flying in that morning. I worked with Kelvin at the RCMP detachment in Carlyle, Saskatchewan, and they had been planning on a trip of their own around the same time as we were, so we decided to do some travelling together. Anyway, after a short wait, the Bears arrived and we hopped a cab into downtown Glasgow. We stayed at McLay's Guest House, which I would not recommend. The lift (read: elevator) was big enough for two people with 1 bag each. But you had to be hugging. I'm serious. The keys to the rooms were the old skeleton key style from the turn of the century (read: last century), and the door to our room looked like perhaps the police had kicked it in on occassion. But luckily, the actual insides of the rooms was worse. We dropped off our bags and went for a coffee. The Bears were pretty jet-lagged, so they decided to grab a few zzz's before continuing on. Recalling our first day, we didn't have a problem with that, so did a bit of window-shopping in downtown Glasgow. After giving them a few good hours, we met up again and decided to do some sight-seeing. Glasgow is a city of art and architecture. We stopped at the McLennan Galleries, and I was able to see an original Rembrandt called "Man in Armour" . There was plenty more, of course, but that was my favourite piece. Leaving there, we walked...and walked...and walked...and eventually made our way to St. Mungo's Cathedral. The Cathedral itself was impressive. We went inside and took some pictures, though due to low lighting, they didn't turn out the greatest.
A graveyard was situated right outside the entrance, and the gravestones were laid flat on the ground. Time and weather had all but worn away the epitaphs. Next door was St. Mungo's museum, where I was able to see an original work by one of my favourite artists, Salvador Dali.
The piece was "Christ of St. John of the Cross". I wasn't overly fascinated with the rest of the museum, so I spent most of my time there just staring at the Dali painting, while the others looked around. Cool. Deciding to give our poor feet a rest, we took the bus from the Cathedral to the university area to look for a place to eat. Ashton Lane was recommended as a street with a lot to offer. We found a place called the Loft which had been converted from an old balcony cinema and had a movie theme. The food was good and affordable. Another long walk took us back to near our hotel, where we had a few drinks at the Driftwood Bar before calling it a night.

A mediocre breakfast greeted us the following morning prior to our departure. With our large backpacks stuffed and strapped on, we made the journey to the train station and took the ScotRail to Edinburgh. There was a bit of confusion on arrival, as we had to find someplace to eat, someplace to sleep, and figure out what we were doing. The food court at the Prince's Mall became our dining choice, after which we grabbed a shuttle to the Globetrotter Inn (hostel) where we would be staying. We dropped off our bags and took the shuttle back downtown. The scenery was great, as you have a nice view of the Scott Monument, Edinburgh Castle, and Arthur's Seat from downtown.We went to Rose Street and found a pub for supper, and another for further drinks, before grabbing the shuttle back to the hostel for the night. The hostel had a little pub of it's own, so we had a few more nightcaps there as well. Most of the hostel patronage is of a younger variety, and a few were there enjoying the night as well. One Scottish lad was considerably intoxicated and kept saying "Beer me!", and treated everyone in the place to a shot of Jaegermeister. Good times.

The next morning, after some cereal and a little laundry, we went out to catch the shuttle. We gave up our seats to some others who had to get in to catch a plane, since the Americans who were last in line wouldn't give up theirs. While we were waiting for the second shuttle, "Beer me!" showed up and we all had a good laugh as he didn't remember much of anything from the night before. He just had a friend call in for him at work, saying he had been hit by a car.
We finally got downtown, and after a coffee at Starbucks (I hate Starbucks....sorry Ann), we proceeded up the Royal Mile to Edinburgh Castle. We toured the Castle for a few hours, seeing the Crown Jewels, the Stone of Destiny, the prisoner of war jail and the War Memorial.
There were also some great views of Edinburgh, given the Castle's elevated position. Tam and I were sitting outside at one of the military museums waiting for the Bears when we saw the actor James Cromwell and his wife walk by. I considered walking up and asking for a photo, but am not the type to want to bother someone on their personal time. I made eye contact and gave a nod and smile, which was returned, and it was left at that. The Bears weren't overly impressed when told about our celebrity sighting, as they had no idea who James Cromwell was. Leaving the Castle, we went back downtown and to supper at the Standing Order bar. It was busy, but the food was good and reasonably priced. After dinner, the Bears went to shop for towels (not supplied by the hostel), while Tam and I waited outside on Rose Street. While standing there, James Cromwell and his wife walked right passed us again, and he gave some money to a homeless guy down at the corner. Tam tried to snap a picture but only got his back, in the dark, far away, and it was blurry. Once again, the Bears were unimpressed when told....but I was oddly reminded of the Polkaroo. We took the shuttle back to the hostel where I finished laundry and watched some television.

And the winner is.....

2005-12-15T21:17:00.000-05:00

People continue to amaze me.

I'm driving home from work, and I see this guy. He's riding a bicycle.....at night....in a snowstorm.....on a highway....towards oncoming traffic....with no lights or reflectors.

Darwin Award waiting to happen.

2005-12-11T07:53:00.000-05:00

Can someone please tell me why it is that EVERY time I am taking a road trip, something goes wrong? If it's not bad weather (as it is today......snowing......AGAIN), it's some kind of problem with my vehicle. At times, I'm really lucky, and it's both.

*grumble*

Off to London this morning so Tam can meet Gordie and we can pick up Gran. Hopefully the weather clears a bit south of here.

A Dog's Life

2005-12-10T23:29:00.000-05:00

Rudy

Progress!

2005-12-10T12:04:00.000-05:00

Well.....Steve the Contractor did finally show up, and started framing the basement. I was out of town for work on Thursday and Friday, so I got to see the progress when I got back Friday night. It's starting to come along.

The Marmasets Are Coming!

2005-12-09T21:27:00.000-05:00

Life would be so much easier if we didn't have to sleep. Think of all that wasted time. What is it....like 1/3 of your life spent sleeping? I envy those people who can function on 2 or 3 hours a night.

I, apparrently, am not one of them.

Just got back from Windsor after doing security for the Liberals. Long hours...a lot of driving....little sleep. I have a new war cry:

Large, double, double.

Don't worry little missy....I'll save you!

Honeymoon in Scotland: Day 1 to 4

2005-12-07T16:34:00.000-05:00

Thanks to a generous wedding gift from my mother, Tam and I were able to travel to Scotland for our honeymoon. I'd always wanted to go, and since we were finally getting married, Tam decided not to raise too much of a stink about it. ;)

We flew out of Toronto on September 30th, 2005, and landed early in the morning on October 1st. It was our first trip overseas, and I was happy to have landed in Glasgow without becoming shark food. There was a bit of moisture in the air, but nothing too serious. Our first hurdle (or mine at least), was learning how to drive in Scotland. Let me tell you....once you've spent 14 years driving on the right side, driving on the left isn't quite as easy as one might think. Getting out of the airport was a nightmare, and I ended up getting onto the motorway (read: highway/freeway/interstate) headed in the wrong direction. The scenery was stunning nonetheless....at least what I saw between lorry-dodging. Eventually, I got myself turned around and headed in the right direction (on the left side). We passed through Glasgow and made the 45 minute journey up to Stirling. The Bannockburn visitor centre was closed, so we proceeded straight to Stirling Castle. Withing a couple of hours of landing in Scotland, I was at the site of one of the most famous battles in the country's history. Wow....what a view. Looking out over Stirling Bridge and the surrounding area from the elevated plateau of the Castle, you could almost picture the armies massing on the battleground below. Across the river, the Wallace Monument stood tall. We toured the outside of the Castle for a while, including a stunning cemetary that sat beneath the walls. A little while later, we headed in and took the guided tour. It was interesting to hear all the history, and witness the damage to the walls from canons and musket shot. In the Great Hall, I got to sit on the throne (or a reasonable facsimile). We spent a good while there, just looking out over the breathtaking landscape. Then we hit the road again. The plan was to make St. Andrew's on the first day, but because we were so tired, we decided just to find some accomodations, eat, and get some rest for the following day. AFter some inquiries at a Tourist Information Centre (TIC), we booked in at a cute little B&B called Wyvis in Tillicoultry. We took a 3 hour nap in the afteroon, got up and went to get something to eat at the local pub, then came back and crashed again. Either it was the most comfortable bed I ever slept in, or we were really tired (perhaps a little of both)! In the morning, we decided against St. Andrews, as apprently there was a big golf tournament going on, and the place was difficult to navigate at the best of times. Given I was still wet behind the ears with my driving, we decided to keep it simple and head up the Coastal Trail. We passed through Dundee and travelled along the North Sea until we reached Arbroath. Here we stopped to see Arbroath Abbey. Now in ruins, the place is stunning nonetheless. Being from such a young country as Canada, the history of these places is overwhelming. It is mindboggling to think of the work that must have went into constructing these places without the benefit of modern technology. From Arbroath, we continued up the coast and stopped at Dunnottar Castle, just south of Stonehaven. Wow. Although a ruins, this Castle was on the most visually stunning piece of land. I wouldn't want to be part of the army laying seige to that castle! There were two great coves on either side of the outcropping the castle sat on, and you could imagine the longships pulling onto the shore hundreds of years ago. Oh....and there was about a million steps down to sea level, and then a million more up to the Castle. But let's not dwell on the negative! After Dunnottar, we had intended to stay over in Aberdeen, but we decided to continue on to Granttown-On-Spey and spend an extra night there. I ended up taking some backroad through the Highlands that was treacherous. A winding, narrow, uphill road filled with perils such as sheep and oncoming vehicles. We were driving so high my ears started to pop. In a town just southeast of our destination, I stopped and gave a boost to a guy with a dead battery (after popping the bonnet!). He was from Granttown, so said he could lead us to our B&B since he was driving that way anyway. Fantastic. He just failed to mention he was a Super Slalom Highland Car Racer. But...I managed to keep up as best I could. We got into Granttown and to our B&B without incident. We stayed at the An Cala Guest House which was excellent. The room, food and our hostess, Val were all great. She made our 2 night stay very enjoyable. The next morning after a delicious Scottish breakfast, we hit the road. It was past 9am, so it was time for some whiskey! We went to the Glenlivet Distillery which was great. It was located in a very remote area of the highlands, southeast of Granttown. They had a free tour where we got to walk through the distillery and see the whole process, start to finish. There was also a little whiskey tasting at the end. Tam didn't wish to partake, but I tried the 18 year. It was good, though I still can't say I'm a huge fan of Scotch whiskey. It's amazing how many casks of whiskey they produce. Millions. And that's just one company. In the highlands around Granttown, there is something in excess of 40 distillerys. Crazy. From there, we drove up to Craigellachie, where we took in the scenery near Telford Bridge over the River Spey. I really started to miss my dog, Rudy, then, as he would have loved it around there. It would have been fun to have been able to take him for a walk. We drove back towards Granttown, and tried to stop at Castle Grant. We were able to get onto the grounds, but the gate to the Castle was closed, and there were too many trees to get a good picture (dagnabit!). So, we drove back to town (after chasing a sheep with the car), and did a little bit of shopping on the main drag before going back to the guest house. We took a little walk to a nearby restarant for supper. It was early (around 5pm), and we were the only ones in the joint. I think traditionally people eat a bit later out there. I tried some Cullen Skink with my supper, and though different, it wasn't too bad. There wasn't much going on that night as far as entertainment, as it was early in the week, so we just made it an early night. The next morning we travelled south towards Aviemore, with a short stop at the Speyside Heather Centre. Not a lot of sight-seeing along the way, as we were headed for Glasgow. We passed through the Trossachs (Rob Roy country) and made a pit stop at Dewar's distillery, courtesy of our bladders, and had a slice of pie in the coffee shop. We made an unscheduled stop at the Falls of Dochart, since were were passing by and they looked pretty cool. We didn't quite make it to Glasgow, instead calling it a night in Balloch, which is at the southern tip of Loch Lomond. It was a cute little town which is growing and nearby an area which has just been set aside as Scotland's first National Park. We booked into our B&B, went out for some supper, and took a nice walk around town before calling it a night.

Next time: Day 5 to 7 (Glasgow and Edinburgh)

Adventures in Basement Building

2005-12-07T10:14:00.000-05:00

I'm listening to Billy Talent because I have some anger.

We bought out house with an unfinished (or minimally finished) basement. The plan was for me to do it myself even though I have no experience, tools, or time to do so. After 5 months with no progress made, we decided it would be best to hire someone to do it. A bazillion estimates later, we decided on a guy who struck me as honest and professional. I had a "good feeling". Being a police officer, you learn to rely on your instincts and first impressions are usually pretty accurate.

So on the day he was coming by to finalize the contract, we discover some water in our basement. It appears we have a stress fracture on one of the poured concrete walls. Outside, the water seems to be pooling and not adequately draining to the weeping tile. This is because the backfill is all clay which doesn't allow the water to drain properly. The contractor says he can fix the crack and will backfill with some stone. Fair enough.

So fixing the leak took about a week where he said it would have taken 2 days, max.

He also tells us that he will start on the basement on Monday. So as mentioned in the previous post, we had my mother-in-law come down to supervise as Tam and I both work, and I cleaned out the basement on Sunday.

Monday comes and goes. No contractor. He calls and tells us he'll be around between 8-8:30 on Tuesday.

Tuesday comes....and he manages to come by in the late afternoon to fill the hole he dug outside. He tells my mother-in-law he'll be by between 8-9 the next morning.

Wednesday comes.....10:00. No contractor. I phone and leave a message. Start this post. He calls around 10:30...saying he'll be here for 11:15.

We'll see.

Nodrog: The Backwards Baby

2005-12-06T17:09:00.000-05:00

Nodrog, of course, is Gordon in reverse.

And Gordon, or "Gordo", is my new baby nephew, born at some ungodly hour on December 3rd, 2005.

But Dave....why backwards? Well....because he wanted to jump into the world feet first. Crazy breach baby. For the entire complicated story, see my brother-in-law's blog, Postcards From London.

As for my part...it goes something like this:

My wife (Tammi) and I had just finished supper. She was talking to my sister Kim on the phone. Kim was uber-pregnant and had her membranes sweeped earlier that day. Natural way to speed up labour, apparently. Anyhoo....when she got off the phone, we took the dog out for a walk. Upon returning, we phoned my mother, who had been talking to Kim, and the mother-to-be was now having contractions.

A little logistics for you. I live in Innisfil, Ontario. Kim is in London, ON, about 2 hours southeast of me. Mother is back in Sudbury, ON, about 3.5 hours north of me.

So Mom was supposed to go down to London for the labour/Christmas. But now it looks like baby boy is coming 2 weeks early. My mother-in-law was supposed to come down that weekend anyway from Sudbury, so we had Tam's father drive her and my mother to Parry Sound (1.5 hours north of me), where we met them.

We left home around 10:45pm......dog in tow.

It was a blizzard. Of course.

I don't remember what time we got to Parry Sound, but we got there. On the way back with the mothers, we got a phone call from Steve. They had a bouncing baby boy just before 1am. Name was withheld for personal introduction to the new Gran. It was now around 2am. Around 3am, we got back as far as Innisfil, and decided that due to weather and mental acuity considerations, we should stop at home and get a few hours sleep.

A few hours is equal to approximately 2.5 hours. By 7:30am, my mom and I were on the road to London (Tam had to work). We got to St. Joseph's in London about 3 hours later, including requisite stops at Tim Horton's and McDonald's. After tracking down Kim and Steve, we were introduced to Gordon Grant Loney, a.k.a. Gordo, a.k.a. Nodrog (the lame name gifted the boy from his uncle, just this very eve). We got to hear about the early morning scare, and take some pictures and video. After a few hours visit, I abandoned my mother and came home, as I had to clean out my basement for the contractor (who didn't show up).

And that's about it. Without further adieu......Gordon Grant Loney.

Coming Soon!

2005-12-06T16:26:00.000-05:00

My Nephew Gordo
Honeymoon in Scotland
The Basement Boondoggle
...and other ramblings.